Still Waters (Lover's Lake)

Just an hour ago, I’d imagined a whole different future for myself. One where I had a lover and a protector and a partner in life. But that had all been reduced to a cam-girl episode gone horribly wrong. Rafa wouldn’t want me anyway when he woke up from his nap. I’d always wanted to change the world, to become a successful white hat hacker and use my skills for the greater good just like Rafa. But I blew that dream exactly like everything else I’d ever touched.

It took me about an hour to reach the bottom of the mountain road to where it crossed with the county highway. I saw a black sedan idling at the bottom of the hill and knew instinctively that it was my ride. I looked both ways before I crossed, but no cars were coming. As I approached the sedan, the back tinted window lowered and there was Stromboli, also known as Matteo Fino in the backseat. He was the syndicate’s techie whiz, although he usually couldn’t hold a candle to me or Ragnar. He got lucky, we were distracted with other things.

“What happened to Bella ragazza? You look like a boy.”

“Fuck you,” I said to the blood sucker.

“No matter, some clients of certain predilections like that look,” he said with his crooked smile. He opened the door and I tossed in my pack and plopped down in the cush seat that stank of expensive cologne and cigars.

“Drive,” the man in front said. The driver stepped on the gas and we pulled back onto the highway.

The sun was just beginning to rise.

Matteo offered me a cigarillo and I took one even though I didn’t smoke often. The man in the passenger’s seat flicked a Zippo and turned to offer me the flame cupped in his giant hand, fingers covered in audacious rings. I leaned into the flame and choked in a lungful of smoke.

It was Gabrielli himself.

Chapter 7

RAFA

I woke up the next morning, feeling like a complete asshole. I didn’t want to run away from Tatum but I was so messed in the head. I shouldn’t have fallen asleep and not connected with her after what we did. I could have at least invited her to sleep in my bed. It was, without a doubt, my mother complex that was fucking with my head. I needed to reach out, be open with her and encourage her to open up to me. Instead I’d shut down and shut her out. I had no idea how she’d be feeling after last night.

Whatever it was, I was clear on my feelings—I needed Tate like the air that I breathed. I’d woken up with the biggest boner of my life and my anxiety simultaneously shot through the roof when I thought I might have fucked things up between us already. Maverick had Sophie, and I was pretty sure Malik now had Trudy, but I wasn’t built like them, the rage from our childhood grabbed a hold of me and wouldn’t let go. I’d suffered through less abuse than they had, yet somehow they walked through the world more sure of themselves.

I didn’t want to let Tatum go without a fight. In twenty-five years, I’d never really been interested developing a relationship with a woman. No one had ever spoken to my heart before, or made it beat faster. No one until Tatum.

“Fuck this bullshit.” I grabbed the sweats off the floor and a clean t-shirt and ran down the hall to find her. I knocked on her door to no answer. I couldn’t blame her, the way I’d acted last night. I’d acted a complete jerk, a total piece of shit. I needed to apologize and make amends.

I opened the door, not caring if I was completely invading her privacy, likely more proof that I wasn’t good enough for her, but I was beyond decorum and social graces. I wanted Tatum—to tear her heart open and lick her wounds. To make her mine in every way that I could. Tattoo her name on my flesh, get her pregnant, marry her and give her my name. I was a crazed man with the need to possess her in every possible way.

What I encountered instead of her brilliant little mind and body was a freshly made bed. Same tuck my cleaning lady used. Last Sunday. She hadn’t slept here last night.

A silent scream tore through my soul.

Panic rose in me and I ran down the stairs two at a time, jumping the last four.

“Tatum! Fio!”

I searched the whole bottom floor. Flinging the back door open I stepped onto the deck.

“Fio!” I screamed.

My voice echoed back eerily through the canyon. There was mist hovering in the clearing and beaded dew on every surface.

“Tatum!” I screamed again.

Trudy rushed down towards me, Malik in tow.