Me: You don’t even know Patrick.
Troublemaker: Yeah, but I know you. I know the kind of words you type when you’re excited about something. You deserve a guy who excites you, who makes you use exclamation points, at the very least. This guy doesn’t. Don’t settle.
I stood there, staring at my phone, not sure what to say, not even sure how I felt. I wanted that, I wanted exactly what Darren said. I wanted someone who excited me, who set me on fire for them, and I didn’t think Patrick was that. I also couldn’t get over how Darren had known.
Troublemaker: Sorry. That probably makes me sound like a dick. I want you to have a good time.
Me: You don’t sound like a dick. At least no more than usual.
Troublemaker: Good. Gotta go. I have practice. Talk soon, Angel.
Me: Talk soon.
I’d gone on two dates that week with Patrick, the second ending in me blowing him and Patrick giving me a handjob where it took entirely too long for me to blow my load before he said, “You’re not feeling this, are you?”
And I wasn’t. I’d known from the first date. Hell, I’d known even beforehand. Darren was right, but I’d been determined to prove him wrong. Determined to give Patrick a chance, but the truth was, the spark simply wasn’t there.
Thankfully, he’d felt the same way, so there were no hard feelings. We decided to continue on as…well, I couldn’t say friends so much as acquaintances.
And for some reason, I was kind of pissed off at Darren about it all. He’d gotten into my goddamn head, and maybe if he hadn’t, things would have gone better. No, that wasn’t it. Again, regardless, it wasn’t right with Patrick. When you knew, you knew, and I’d known it with him.
I called Darren around ten. He had a home game the next day, and I worried I was calling too late, but then he answered with a soft, “Hello?”
“Were you sleeping?”
“No.”
Another thought hit me and nearly stole my breath. “Shit. Are you not alone? You didn’t have to answer.” Great, he was with some woman, and his new best friend called because he had a shitty date.
“What? No. I’m by myself. I wasn’t earlier, though…”
For no reason at all, it was suddenly a little harder to breathe. “I wasn’t either.”
“I know. Date number two with Patrick. How did it go?”
“I got to give head, so that was good.”
“Wait. You like doing that?”
I rolled my eyes. “Fuck yes. I love sucking dick. Don’t you think the women you’re with enjoy going down on you?”
“Clearly, since it’s me, but that was boring-ass Patrick, so I thought it would be different.”
I laughed, then fell back onto my bed. “Stop. He’s a nice guy.”
“I didn’t say he wasn’t nice. I said he was boring, and you need the opposite of that.”
“So, fun? Isn’t that the opposite of boring?” Again, I chuckled, then found myself asking, “What about you?” Forget that it was odd. I was curious.
“I did not give head tonight, but I did receive it. We have an arrangement, she and I. She likes to have fun as much as I do. She’s not into relationships and all that, so it works. Took me for fucking ever to bust a nut tonight, though. I don’t know what it was.”
My dick twitched.
Down, boy. Thinking about Darren’s cock needed to stop happening ASAP. He was my friend. My straight friend.
Also, I kind of loved that he felt this comfortable talking to me.
“I got Patrick off quickly. I don’t mean to brag, but I’m an excellent cocksucker. Took me a bit with his handy, for some reason.”
“You sucked him and he only jerked you off? Asshole!”
“Again, you are the weirdest straight man I’ve ever met.”
“There’s nothing wrong with talking sex with your gay best friend.”
“Isn’t that Anson?”
“Shit. Your other gay best friend. Wow. How did I end up with two of them?” We laughed. “On the real, though…I don’t think of you that way—you or Anson, if you’re wondering. As my gay this or that. Just my friend.”
“I know.” Jesus, I liked Darren a lot.
We were both quiet for a moment, like we didn’t know what to say. We didn’t often have these types of silences between us. We rambled about everything and nothing, and when we were quiet, it was usually comfortable.
Darren spoke first. “What do you like about it?” His voice was softer, almost unsure.
“Like about what?” I didn’t know why I asked, because I knew. I guess it was because I hadn’t expected him to be curious.
“Blowing a guy. You knew what I meant.”
I sighed. “You have to admit, it’s an odd question from you.”
“Is anything strange from me?”
I grinned. “You have a point. I guess it’s the same kind of stuff you enjoy about eating out a woman. It’s sex, and sex feels good. Giving someone pleasure feels good too.”