I laughed. “Keep my fingers inside you at all times. Got it. And I love you too.”
Chapter Twenty-Six
Darren
Christmas
“Momma! Mia’s teasing me!” I called out, and my sister rolled her eyes.
“You’re such a momma’s boy.”
I was joking around, of course. I mean, my sister was giving me shit, but we were always giving each other shit. It was just fun to tell on her. It didn’t matter how old we were, Momma would come and break it up.
She came into the room. “Mia, leave your brother alone.”
“What? You didn’t even ask what happened! Maybe he was the one being mean to me!”
“Yeah, but your brother’s going through a hard time. How’s your arm, baby?” Momma came over and babied me for a minute before returning to the kitchen.
When she was gone, Jeremy threw a couch pillow at my face. “Darren! Oh my God. You’re the worst.”
“Is it a wonder he’s used to getting his way?” Mia said to him.
“Aren’t you supposed to take my side?” I joked.
“Not when your side is being a tattletale,” he countered.
“See? I knew you were cool,” Mia said to Jeremy. “I finally know what it’s like to have a good brother.”
Not gonna lie, it felt good to hear. I wanted them to be close. I wanted everyone in my family to be close to him, because Jeremy was mine, which meant he had to be theirs too.
“Now come on so I can beat you in air hockey,” Mia added.
“You wish,” Jeremy countered, and then I sat there and grumbled because I wanted to play too.
Things had been pretty uneventful since that day at the center when I’d first met Kordell. He’d come in twice more to talk with me, and there was nothing like the feeling of being there for someone. It reminded me so much of when I was younger and Momma would come home and talk about a special student or what it was like to work with kids. I hated his situation, and even though things in my life were up in the air at the moment, my being honest about who Jeremy and I were to each other helped Kordell and maybe others.
That feeling was worth the hard parts.
Having Jeremy was too.
The Lightning were still doing well without me, which was a mixed bag. I wanted them to do well. They were my team. I always wanted what was best for them, but this quiet voice inside me, one I was ashamed of, wanted them to need me.
I would be going in early the following week to see about removing my brace for good, which I couldn’t fucking wait for, but I wouldn’t be able to play, of course. I had therapy and rehab to do. Everything depended on how my arm had healed and how I progressed during the next steps.
I watched Jeremy and Mia play air hockey for a little while. They were in the zone, one game after the other. They were both competitive, my whole family was.
Then I went into the living room. Lee and Deon were talking about shit I had zero interest in—both being numbers guys—so I retreated to the kitchen, where Momma was.
“Hey, baby. How are you really doing?”
I sat at the breakfast bar. “I’m all right. Some of the shit is settling down. I finally looked at the comments on my photo of me and Jere. While there are assholes, there’s a lot of support too. I just hate the unknown and feeling so helpless in it all. I have no control.”
“Mm-hm.” She began to prepare the cornbread mixture. “The thing is, you do have control. Maybe not over everything, of course. You can’t force your arm to heal a certain way or force the Lightning to sign you.”
“Thanks, Momma, but this isn’t really helping.”
She chuckled. “Let me finish. But you do have control over yourself. You stood proud in who you are. You love that man, and you didn’t let fear of the unknown hold you back. You took what control you had over your actions. And you’ll control how much you give in rehab, and how you react to whatever happens with the Lightning and what your future holds. Life isn’t always perfect, baby, but we take our control where we can. We fight the best way we know how because outside of the people we love, no one else is gonna do that. The battle is yours, but you know you have a whole army behind you with us, your friends, Jeremy. He’s crazy about you.”
I smiled, couldn’t hold it back if I wanted to. “I’m the same with him. I didn’t know it was possible to feel this much for someone who wasn’t family.”
“That’s how I felt when I met your daddy.” She didn’t have to specify she meant Deon and not my biological father. She never would have called him that to me because he wasn’t my dad. Deon was, even if I didn’t always address him that way. “Especially when I saw the way Deon fit in with you and your sister. And I knew Lee was special when Mia brought him home. Now, seeing Jeremy interact with us, I know it about him too. You did good, and no matter what happens, football isn’t life. Life is about the people you love and who love you in return.”