“Hi, Alyssa,” I softly spoke. She cringed and closed her eyes. Her hand stayed in the air and I took it in my own, laying her fingers against my cheek. A small whimper of pain escaped her lips as her skin laid against mine. I pulled her closer into a hug, and it felt just like yesterday. Her skin was so cold, like always, and my body heated hers up. Her fingers moved from my cheek, and she wrapped both arms around my neck, holding onto me as if she forgave me for all of the missed calls and silence.
Her fingers clung to me, almost digging into my flesh as if she thought I was some kind of mirage that would disappear if she didn’t keep hold. I didn’t blame her—I’d disappeared before.
I inhaled her hair.
Peaches.
God, I hated peaches until that day.
She smelled like the days when summer went to sleep and awakened as fall. Soft, sweet, perfect.
My fucking High.
“I missed…” she spoke against my ear.
“I know,” I replied.
“You left…” she started.
“I know,” I replied.
“How dare you…” she began.
“I know,” I replied.
Her body tensed up and she yanked away from me. The sadness in her eyes was gone. Only anger remained.
That seems right.
“You know?” she hissed, standing tall, but still so small. Her arms crossed and she bit her bottom lip. The small crinkles in the corners of her eyes deepened, and it was clear that she wasn’t that same girl I left behind years ago. She was a grown woman now, and she had a fire burning deep in her soul. “I called you.”
“I know.”
Her brow furrowed. “No. I called you, Logan. I called you and left you over five hundred messages.”
One thousand and ninety messages.
I didn’t want to correct her.
“You disappeared. You left me. Us. Kellan. You left us all,” she said. “I understand you needing your space, but you left me. After everything we’ve been through—after what happened—you left me alone with that.”
“I was getting better. I was working through the shit with my mom, the shit with you, and yeah, I was a mess, but I just needed time.”
“I gave you space, and you still stayed gone.”
“You called me every day, Alyssa. That’s not giving me space.”
“Kellan and I saved your life, and we thought you’d come back. I called you every day to let you know I was here, waiting. I thought you’d come back for me. For us.”
“You can’t save people’s lives, and you can’t expect people to come back for you, Alyssa. You should’ve known that after what happened with—” I bit my tongue, stopping my speech, but I knew I couldn’t take back my words. She knew what I was going to say. You should’ve known that after what happened with your father.
“That was mean.”
“I didn’t say anything.”
Her head shook back and forth. “For someone who said nothing, it sure communicated plenty.” Her voice cracked. “Over five hundred messages, and not one reply.”
One thousand and ninety messages.