Elliot and the Goblin War (Underworld Chronicles 1)

“Of course,” Patches agreed. “You can call it the Chocolate Cake of Horror.”

“Yes,” Grissel said. “The Horrifying Chocolate Cake of Horrible Horror.”

Patches thought her name was better, but she let it pass.

A short time later, Elliot found a round, double-layer chocolate cake waiting on his doorstep. The Goblins had added extra chocolate to the recipe, just to make his suffering even worse. They also put shaved pieces of chocolate bar on top. When he found it, Elliot showed it to his Uncle Rufus, who happened to have a shiny gold plate under his coat to set it on. Wendy added a few cherries around the outside, and Cole and Kyle even washed their muddy hands before eating it. It made for a beautiful dessert, even without frosting or milk.

Patches was ready the next day for an even better way to trick the Goblins. It was clear that Goblins knew very little about humans, because she could tell them almost anything and they’d try it. As long as she kept this up, King Elliot would be safe. She waited all morning for them to come get her next idea. It had to do with tricking the Goblins into finding some Leprechaun gold to give Elliot. She thought Elliot would like that. But they didn’t come. Morning turned to afternoon, and now she really wanted them to come, because she also wanted a carrot.

Patches stared up at the surface. Somewhere up there was a pile of carrots. She could smell them.

Normally, Brownies aren’t very good climbers. Their plump bodies are better made for playing on the ground. However, a hungry Brownie is able to do many things a not-so-hungry Brownie wouldn’t normally do.

She had to climb the rock wall. And she had to do it now, before anyone came to check on her.

Patches stared up at the rock hole. It was about ten feet to the surface, which is pretty far when you’re only two feet tall. There were no branches to hold on to. There was no dirt she could kick at to make a step for her foot.

Patches studied the rock wall. It wasn’t smooth and flat. The wall was like a climbing puzzle. Near the bottom was a chunk that stuck out a little. She could fit a toe there. To her right, if she stretched for it, there was a tiny little ledge. She could get a good grip on the rock with her fingers. She really could do this. Or at least she could try.

Patches grabbed some rock and began to climb.

Very slowly and carefully, she found more pieces of the puzzle. There was always another way to move higher. Sometimes it meant moving to the side. Sometimes she had to reach farther than her arm thought it could reach. The effort took all her muscles, some of which she didn’t know she had until they began to get tired and almost allowed her to drop off the wall. Patches told her muscles she was sorry for making them work so hard and promised to forget about them once she got home. Her muscles agreed to the deal and continued to help her climb.

Bit by bit, Patches moved closer to the top of the hole.

When she was halfway up, she stole a quick peek below her. She was farther up than she had thought, and the ground looked very far away.

A few Goblins at the top of the rock hole began talking.

Patches froze against the wall. The last thing she needed was to be found out now. The Goblins had kept her alive because they wanted her help in getting King Elliot. But they hadn’t come for her help today. Before long, they’d decide that the best help she could give was to sit quietly while they ate her.

The talking at the top of the hole turned to fighting. She couldn’t hear everything they said, but she did catch some words like “guard the carrots”

and “your turn.” It sounded as if one of them had chased the others away from the hole, and pretty soon it was quiet again. Patches continued her tricky climb.

She was so tired by the time she reached the top of the hole that she wanted to curl up and go to sleep right there on the surface. But there was a very good chance that if she did sleep, the next time she woke up it would be inside a Goblin belly. That thought gave her enough energy to crawl behind a pile of rocks and hide.

Patches had never been in Flog before. The city was dark and dirty, and the wind had a smell of rotting fish. No wonder the Goblins were making war against the Brownies. Burrowsville was so beautiful compared to this place. Once the Goblins won the war, they could take over Burrowsville. It wouldn’t be long before they ruined it, just as they had ruined Flog. After all, Goblins were the only creatures she knew who had planted their garbage and actually gotten something to grow.

Two voices were coming toward her.

Patches quickly looked around for a better place to hide. These rocks wouldn’t keep a Goblin from smelling her. Behind her was a small cave. Her ears tingled. She was sure she heard carrots inside. Lots of fat, juicy carrots inviting her to come and hide with them for a while. What polite carrots they were. Such very nice carrots.

Maybe that wasn’t actually true. Patches knew she must be very, very hungry if she thought carrots were talking to her. But she had to find somewhere to hide fast and couldn’t think of a luckier place. She ran into the cave only seconds before the voices came right up to the rock hole.

“I told you Patches was tricking you,” the first voice said. “Humans happen to love chocolate cake!”

Patches’s ears perked up. That was Fudd Fartwick’s voice! What was Fudd doing in Flog?

“You also told me Patches knows all about humans,” the second voice said. “You want to get rid of the human king. I thought maybe Patches did too.”

Patches knew that second voice. It belonged to Grissel. If Fudd and Grissel were here together, then Fudd must be helping the Goblins. How could Fudd do such a thing?

Unaware that Patches was hiding only a few feet behind him, Grissel called down into the hole. “Do you hear that, Brownie girl? I’m not using any more of your ideas, and you’re not getting any more of our carrots. You’re not so smart after all!”

Inside the cave, Patches barely breathed. She was sure the only reason Grissel couldn’t smell her in here was because she was surrounded by so many carrots.

“She didn’t answer,” Grissel said. “Now that’s just rude.”