Patches put her hands on her hips. "It's still a long way, Elliot, and without me you'll be lost. Do you want my help or not?"
"Fine," Elliot said. "Let's go."
He followed Patches across a wide field of tiny white flowers that made him sneeze. And every time he sneezed, it blew the flower apart into bits that created new flowers where they landed. By the time they left the field, there were hundreds more flowers than when he began. He followed her up a tall, sandy hill where with every footstep he slid almost as far down as where he began. Patches was lighter and climbed it much faster but waited for him while he heaved his way to the top.
"That wasn't much fun," he said once he arrived.
"Yeah, but going down makes the climb worth it." She turned and leapt into the air, landing on the soft sand and rolling the rest of the way down the long hill.
Elliot followed, laughing as he rolled until he got a mouthful of sand and wisely kept his mouth closed the rest of the way. Once he reached the bottom, he and Patches lay on the sand and laughed a little longer.
"My dad would've taken you around the hill instead of over it," Patches said. "Now aren't you glad I'm here?"
Elliot nodded. "You have to go home soon, though. You can't come into Demon Territory with me."
"Oh, I forgot," Patches said, sitting up. "That's the other thing I had to tell you!"
But she never got a chance to tell him because at the last moment--
Dear Reader, don't you hate it when a character is about to say something really important, but they never get a chance to say it, because they're interrupted by something else? Maybe someday you'll have something really important to say, such as, "Mom, did you know the house is on fire?" Even if someone tries to interrupt you, like your little brother asking for a drink of water, you should still tell your mother about the fire. Not only was it rude for your little brother to interrupt and you have to teach him good manners, but your mother will probably also want to use that glass of water for the fire.
In this case, Patches never got a chance to finish what she was going to say, because Harold the Shapeshifter poofed in right in front of Elliot. He was still in Elliot's form, and the only reason she could tell them apart was that Harold had a small patch of white hair on the back of his head.
It took Elliot a moment to realize that it was not a mirror that had suddenly poofed in, but it was actually Harold, who looked exactly like him.
Elliot tried to say hello, but Harold spoke first. "I'm very sorry to tell you this," he said to Elliot, "but you'll have to stay in the Underworld forever. I won't let you go home ever again."
Except for the Pixie prison, Elliot quite liked the Underworld and thought if he ever did get home, he might want to return for a nice visit one day. But he didn't want to stay in the Underworld forever. For one thing, his family was on the surface, and he missed them. For another, Underworld creatures thought chocolate was about the worst thing since liver and onions. Elliot couldn't see himself living anywhere without chocolate.
And he didn't at all like Harold the Shapeshifter telling him he couldn't go home again.
Elliot dropped his bundle just as Harold was drawing in a large breath of air to change into something, probably a scary something. He grabbed Harold's ear and held on tight.
"Stop that!" Harold said. "I've got to change into something that can kill you."
"I'm sick of everyone in the Underworld trying to kill me lately," Elliot said. "So it's bad timing on your part. I'm not letting go."
Harold grabbed Elliot's shoulders and started kicking his shins. In turn, Elliot kicked him back, all the time keeping hold of Harold's ear.
"That really hurts," Harold said.
"It's my ear I'm pinching anyway," Elliot said. "You're just borrowing it."
"It's your ear, but it's on my body, and it hurts. Want to see what it's like?" With that, Harold grabbed Elliot's ear.
"Ow!" Elliot yelped. "You're pinching harder than I am." So he pinched Harold's ear harder. In return, Harold began stomping on his feet.
"You can't stomp on a king's foot," Patches said. She rolled up her sleeves and flung some magic toward Harold, who suddenly sank to the ground like all the bones had gone out of his body. Elliot, who had been holding tightly to Harold's ear, also dropped to the ground, but he knew he still had bones, because they cracked against a rock as he landed.
"What did you do to him?" Elliot asked.
"I just zapped his energy for a couple of seconds," Patches said. "An Elf taught me that trick a while ago."
"Cool." Elliot leaned in to Harold and asked, "So why do you want to kill me?"
"I'm in love," Harold said. "We Shapeshifters sometimes do crazy things when we're in love."
"That's stupid," Elliot said. "Who are you in love with? My sister, Wendy? Because I've got news for you. You're up there pretending to be me, so if you go and fall in love with your sister, that's just creepy."