"That's fine for you, but how do I get in?" Elliot asked.
Harold sighed. "Do I have to do everything? Honestly, you'd think I was the only one who wanted to see you killed today." He rubbed his hands together, then ran them along the edges of Elliot's ears. Elliot felt a tickling sensation in his head. When Harold removed his hands, Elliot touched his ears. They were pointed, like Harold's.
"You can change my shape?" he asked.
"I can only change a few small things, and those won't last more than five or ten minutes, so we've got to hurry. Are you ready for this, Elliot? Because after the next step you take, it'll be too late to turn back."
Elliot held his breath, closed his eyes, and took the next step.
Harold and Elliot hurried to the entrance of Demon Territory, which was very clearly marked with a large sign, just as Fudd had described to Elliot. The sign said, Warning: You are now entering Demon Territory. All creatures must enter at their own risk. Humans may not enter for any reason.
Dear Reader, it's important to pay attention to signs. For example, if you ever see a sign telling you not to swim because there are alligators in the water, then you should definitely obey the sign. Sometimes alligators will pretend to be friendly, hoping to trick you into coming into the water. Then they'll eat you. However, if you ever see a sign telling you that it's okay to swim in a place where you know alligators live, you still shouldn't go in. It's possible that the alligators got a marker and changed the sign. Alligators are a lot trickier than most people think.
A female Elf as tall as Harold the Elf, but with long, golden hair, stood in front of the sign. Elliot thought she looked very bored. There probably weren't many creatures who came this way, so she probably didn't have much to do.
She straightened up as Harold and Elliot came closer. "You wish to enter Demon Territory?"
"We're on a long trip, and it's a shortcut," Harol
d said.
"I don't recognize you, Elf," she said. "What is your name?"
"We're southern hemisphere Elves," Harold answered. "We're here on a journey of discovery."
"Demon Territory is dangerous, even to Elves," she said. "I suggest you take the longer path."
"This is our path," Harold said. "You have no right to stop us, so allow us to pass."
"It's true I have no right to stop you," the Elf said. "I can only stop humans."
Elliot laughed like that was ridiculous. "Humans down here?" he said, slapping at his leg. "What is the Underworld coming to?"
The Elf looked at Elliot. "You don't look like an Elf to me."
"He's a young one," Harold said. "And notice the long legs. The rest of him will grow soon."
"No, it's in the face. It doesn't have the smooth beauty of Elfish skin. The eyes, there's too much fear in them for an Elf."
Elliot tried to get rid of the fear in his eyes, but that's not as easy as it sounds. The harder he tried, the more afraid he got that he couldn't get rid of the fear.
"Of course I'm an Elf," he said, then his eyes widened. "In fact, I'm so much an Elf that it's the initials of my name."
"Oh? What's your name?"
Elliot looked around. Suddenly he didn't want to say his full name. Not with Harold listening anyway. He leaned in close to the Elf female and whispered, "Elliot Louise Penster."
Dear Reader, clever as you are, you no doubt picked up on Elliot's middle name: Louise. And, yes, it is a girl's name. Here's how it happened. When Elliot was born, his middle name was supposed to be Louis. He would be named after his grandfather, Louis Penster, who was a war hero, a fighter pilot, and, lately, the slowest driver in the fast lane of the highway. The nurse who wrote down Elliot's name was very smart at nursing, but she was a terrible speller. This is because as a child, she played nurse on her dolls when she was supposed to be studying her spelling words. So when she wrote the birth certificate, she put an e on the end of Elliot's middle name, thus making him Elliot Louise Penster for life. His parents were saving up the money to get his birth certificate changed, but the money always seemed to go to other needs, like dinner.
"Elliot Louise Penster?" the Elf said. "Your initials spell ELP." (Apparently, the Elf was better at spelling than Elliot's nurse.) "And it sounds like a human name."
Elliot laughed. "Human name, yes, my parents--who are Elves, of course--are big fans of humans. In fact, that's the rest of my name. Elliot Louise Penster Human. E-L-P-H. That spells Elph."
Elliot was very good at spelling. And you have to agree, Dear Reader, that sometimes he is a very good thinker.
"Elph," the Elf said. "Let me see your ears."
Elliot turned his head so that she could inspect his ears. She tugged on them and twisted them until he said, "Ouch." That was the second time today someone had pulled on his ears.