He looked at her with blazing eyes. “Have you forgotten me so completely? I keep my bargains.”
His meaning was clear. “I thought you would have found out by now,” she said softly.
&n
bsp; “You mean found out why you left me alone with $500 to pay me for services rendered? I made an effort not to find out.”
“When I told my father that he had to allow us to marry because I was carrying your child, he had me forcibly put on a train to Ohio. Nelson Younger owed my father a great deal of money, and the debt was paid when he married me.”
“I was told—,” Kane began.
“I’m sure you were told that I’d run away rather than marry you. No doubt my father said a few words about his daughter dallying with the stable lad, but she’d certainly not marry him. You were always so easy to get to. That pride of yours was so easily wounded.”
Kane was silent for a while. “And the child?”
“Zachary is thirteen now, a wonderful boy, handsome, strong, as full of pride as his father.”
Kane stood quite still, looking out over the acres of garden.
“Leave with me now, Kane,” Pam whispered. “If not for my sake, then for your son’s.”
“My son’s,” Kane said under his breath. “Tell me, was this man you married good to ’im?”
“Nelson was quite a bit older than me, and he was pleased to have a child whether Zach was his or not. He loved Zach.” She smiled. “They used to play baseball together every Saturday afternoon.”
Kane looked back at her. “And Zachary thinks of this man as his father?”
Pam stood. “Zach would learn to love you as I do. If you and I told him the truth . . . ”
“The truth is that Nelson Younger was Zachary’s father. All I did was plant the seed.”
“Are you rejecting your own son?” Pam asked with anger.
“No, I’m not. You send the boy to me and I’ll take ’im. Sight unseen. It’s you, Pam, I’m rejectin’.”
“Kane, I don’t want to beg. If you don’t love me now, you could learn to again.”
He took both her hands in his. “Listen to me. What happened to us was a long time ago. I don’t guess I knew until now how much I’d changed. If you’d been here a few months ago, I’d have run with you to the altar, but it’s different now. Houston—.”
She pulled away from him. “You say she doesn’t love you. Do you love her?”
“I hardly know her.”
“Then why? Why turn away a woman who loves you? Why turn your back on your own son?”
“I don’t know, damn you! Why do you have to show up on my weddin’ day and make me miserable? How can you ask me to humiliate a woman who’s been so . . . kind to me? I can’t go off and leave her standin’ at the altar.”
Tears began to run down Pam’s face as she sat down on the bench. “Nelson was kind to me also and loved Zachary so much. I tried to find you to tell you what’d happened, but you seemed to have vanished. Years later, when I began to see your name in the papers, I couldn’t find the courage to write—or maybe I couldn’t bear to hurt Nelson. When he died, I wanted to find you. I felt so guilty, like I was running from Nelson’s deathbed to my lover’s arms, but I’d waited so very long. Then Zachary became ill and, by the time he could travel to Chandler, you were engaged. I told myself it was over between us, but at the last minute, I had to see you, had to tell you.”
He sat beside her, put his arm about her shoulders and pulled her head down. “Listen, love, you always were a romantic. Maybe you don’t remember our fights, but I do. The only place we were good together was in a haystack. Two thirds of the time we were mad at each other. Over the years, you’ve forgotten all the bad parts.”
Pam blew her nose on a lace-edged handkerchief. “Is Miss Chandler any better?”
“When I do somethin’ she doesn’t like, she hits me over the head with whatever’s handy. You always ran off and hid and worried whether I still loved you.”
“I’ve grown up since then.”
“How could you? You’ve lived with an old man that spoiled you, just like your father did. No one’s ever spoiled Houston.”