Tenger muttered orders for everyone else to leave, and when they had gone, Gabe sat in the chair across from me and leaned forward, elbows on his knees. For a long time he remained silent, waiting for me to begin.
Finally, I did. “If she had wanted to, she could have killed me. There is still more good in her than bad.”
“For now.”
His words hung in the air. I couldn’t ignore them.
“You’re a blind fool,” he said. “Here you have Harlyn, who hangs on your every word. She’d marry you yesterday and would be a partner you could trust and rely on. You’re losing her, and for what? The nicest thing you can say about Kestra is that she could have killed you but didn’t. Not for the first time, I might add.”
For some reason, that made me smile, but Gabe continued. “From the moment you first saw Kestra, you lost your reason and logic. It’s time to claim it again, my friend, and it starts now. I’m going to leave and send Harlyn in here so that you two can talk. Remember that everything is on the line. The future of Antora, our lives, and the entire purpose for the rebellion. Do what you must to preserve all that we h
ave fought for.”
I hated that he was right. Having to admit that, even to myself, tore at my heart, yet the same thoughts had been weighing on me for weeks. It was time that I finally listened. I gave him a brief nod; he smiled grimly and stood up, leaving the room. A moment later, Harlyn entered. For her, I forced myself to my feet.
We faced each other awkwardly, then Harlyn said, “What are the orders of the Halderian king?”
I drew a slow breath. “I’ll send you with Rawk back to the Hiplands. I want every soldier of our armies, or everyone who wishes to join in this fight against Lord Endrick, to assemble here as quickly as possible. Can you bring them here?”
Harlyn straightened up. “You intend to fight Lord Endrick, then?”
“The Halderians will be there when he is destroyed.” Forcing the words from my mouth caused a deep pain within me, but they had to be spoken. “And we will celebrate when the Scarlet Throne is ours again at last.”
Harlyn tilted her head. “Ours?”
“Yours and mine.”
Harlyn smiled. “I’ll return with our cavalry, Simon, I promise.”
She gave me a kiss and a warm embrace that left me feeling colder than before, and finally excused herself to make preparations to leave.
Gabe entered again and smiled at me when he saw how happy Harlyn looked. Once we were alone, he said that Tenger and Hugh were on their way to meet the Brill. “I don’t like a foreign army joining us,” he added. “Don’t we have enough strategies of our own? Remember that binding cord from Lonetree Camp?”
“Of course.”
“I’ve still got it. If we find Kestra, maybe it’d work to keep her with us for more than a few minutes.”
If only we could. “I think we’re beyond that now.”
He encouraged me to sleep, but I couldn’t. I only sat at the window, gazing out at a chilly day in which lazy snowflakes drifted listlessly in the air, lit by a waning sun.
I heard the trouble before I saw it, the sounds of marching in perfect step. Ironhearts. They were loud enough to awaken Gabe, who joined me at the window.
“They’re not headed toward Endrick’s palace,” Gabe said. “They’re going north.”
And I was certain of why. Endrick had to know where Kestra and Joth were. And I knew who was likely in the company of the Ironhearts.
“We have to be there,” I said, reaching for my boots.
Gabe shook his head. “Those aren’t the odds I’m willing to accept. If we go, it’ll be the four of us against a hundred or more.”
I stopped long enough to look up at him, making sure he understood that I was going whether he came with me or not. “I think Rosaleen will be one of those Ironhearts.”
“Your sister?” He let out a low whistle. “So whose side will we be on?”
Kestra had asked whether I’d sacrifice my life for her. My mother had given her life for Kestra. I would not lose my sister too.
That was the only thing I knew for sure. Gabe and I reached for our weapons to fight an enemy I could no longer define, and for a purpose I could no longer defend.