“The help you have given me does not qualify you to take what is mine. Your reward is all that I have done for your people, all that I will still do.”
“That is their reward, but what will you offer me? We joined powers, Kestra—what did you think that would mean? We are not simply using each other for magic—we have connected our lives! I told you that would happen.”
“You told me it often happened, not that it must happen. And I will be the exception, Joth. I will take the throne alone. If you cannot accept those terms, then you may withdraw now and lead your people back to permanent captivity in the forest.”
His face reddened, but he finally got his temper under control and said, “None of this matters if we fail to defeat Endrick. Let’s keep our attention there. The rest can be decided later.”
We barely spoke another word to each other as we made our preparations to leave. Joth had ventured into the city earlier that day and obtained for me leather pants, a belted tunic with protective padding on the shoulders and elbows, and a new cloak to protect me from the wintry cold, though with all the ice inside me, I hardly cared about the snow outside. I wound my hair into a braid and had just put the Olden Blade in place against my thigh when a knock came at our door.
My head shot up, and I looked over at Joth, who didn’t seem at all surprised. Which told me two things. First, that no matter how often he claimed that we were working together, he was still holding back from me. And second, that he must have had some warning from the half-lives who were keeping watch on this place, which meant I did not have full access to his magic.
Yet he seemed to have full access to mine. That would have to change, and soon.
Joth crossed to the door and opened it. I arched my head in that direction, but relaxed as soon as I heard, “Darrow.”
I rushed to the door, intending to close him into an embrace, but I paused when I saw him. For as long as I’d known him, this man had been a servant, and a friend. I’d thought about him hundreds of times since figuring out who he was, but I had never known him as a father.
Yet there he was. As alive and whole as he’d been before that night when the Coracks stopped my carriage and shot him, then carried him from my sight. That seemed like ages ago, and everything was so different now.
Different enough that I could only widen the door for him to enter and greet him with, “Hello, Darrow.” Nothing more.
He shifted his weight, looking as uncomfortable as I felt. Maybe he had expected more from me, something that I was incapable of offering. But why should it have been otherwise?
Finally, I asked, “How did you find us?”
“The half-lives brought him here,” Joth said, then to Darrow added, “Where is Loelle?”
“Captured by the Brill as we tried to sneak into the city. I don’t think they’ll harm her, though they said they’d give her to the Coracks. I can’t say what they will do to her.”
Nor could I. Loelle had worked with them for years as their trusted physician, but I knew now that her service had nothing to do with loyalty. She had been waiting for the Coracks to find an Infidante … to find me. Once I’d been chosen, Loelle had manipulated the situation to ensure I obtained magic, then taken me away from the Coracks, solely within her control. Forgiveness would not come easily to her, if it came at all.
I looked from Darrow over to Joth. We had just learned that his mother was being returned to the very group she had betrayed, and he didn’t seem particularly concerned. Would I respond the same way now, if it had been Darrow in captivity? Was I similarly hardened?
Joth saw me watching him and, with almost no emotion, said, “You know the Coracks better than anyone. Will they harm my mother?”
“Not if they have any reason to keep her alive.” Which should have been a thin comfort, but it seemed to fully satisfy Joth. For my own sake, I added, “Loelle is a great healer. That might be enough.”
Joth slowly nodded. “Then we’ll take care of the task ahead of us first.”
“I suggest you go prepare for it now.” Darrow gestured toward the door, and his voice became stern. “Let me speak with my daughter.”
Joth’s eyes darted between Darrow and me as he contemplated what to do. Finally, he licked his lips, then excused himself, saying he would ready our horses. Darrow and I remained facing each other. He looked me over and seemed to understand why I was dressed this way.
“So the attack is tonight?”
I tilted my head. “How much do you know?”
“I know only what Joth has communicated to the other half-lives.” He stepped forward. “Is there anything else I should know?”
I considered telling him about Simon, and almost did, except that when I opened my mouth, no words came out. I had no way of explaining to my father what I could not explain to myself.
His brows pressed together. “What else, Kestra?”
I shrugged. “There’s no one else.” I winced, even as the words came from my mouth. I should have said there was nothing else. Surely Darrow would catch the mistake.
If he did, he put that aside and instead said, “I’ll come with you.”
I considered that for a moment. “You can’t help me. And besides, I must focus on Endrick. I won’t be able to protect you.”