My heart crashed against my chest in sudden terror. What had I done?
If I had felt panic before, that was nothing compared to the surge that threatened me now. Exhausted by the force of magic I’d just created, I had nothing left to calm myself. It was no longer a perception that the walls were closing in. The only exit I knew had been destroyed, and I had no idea if there was any escape ahead.
I tried standing. Even if it hurt, I had to move, I had to find a way out.
Yet my ankle collapsed again.
“Kestra—”
“Don’t say another word, Harlyn! Or I’ll … I’ll …” My breath began to choke me. I could no longer speak.
“Kestra, you need to stay calm. For both our sakes.”
She didn’t understand. She didn’t know how bad it was for me, and if she did know, she’d only continue to use my fears against me.
I tried a third time to stand and fell harder to the ground than before. I searched for a whisper of magic, anything to get me through the next few minutes.
“Kestra! Kestra, can you hear me?”
I heard her. I just didn’t care, or see how anything she wanted to discuss in the moment should mean a thing to me.
“I’m coming over to you—unarmed. Please don’t attack me.”
I vaguely heard dragging noises, but an hour seemed to pass as I tried to get control of my breathing, tried to slow my pulse, tried to convince myself that everything I believed was happening—everything I was certain was happening—was not real.
Then a hand touched my shoulder, firm but not aggressive, and Harlyn said, “It’s all right, Kestra. It’s going to be all right.”
I shook off her hand, but Harlyn wrapped her whole arm around me, the uninjured arm. Even then I heard a slight gasp as she did.
“Just breathe,” she whispered. “It’ll be all right if you breathe.”
Keeping my eyes closed tight, I listened to her words and concentrated on the air flowing in and out of my lungs. Soon the worst of the panicked feelings began to dissipate.
Eventually, she removed her arm, but she remained close beside me. I was so weak, so exhausted. And there she was within easy reach of me. I could take everything from her.
I stretched out a hand until I found the source of the wound, the fabric of her sleeve wet with blood.
“Do you trust me?” I asked.
“No.”
“Well, you left your weapons against that wall, so you have no choice.”
I put my hand on her arm and pulled strength from her, absorbing it to myself like a thirsty sponge. She grimaced from my touch and tried to push me off, but as I became stronger and she weakened, her efforts did nothing to stop me.
Then, as soon as I was certain I had enough, I used that strength to pull the wound from her body, taking the worst of it for myself. When the wound began to seal, I let her go and leaned against the tunnel wall, beyond exhausted.
Minutes passed before either of us spoke. She broke the silence by saying, “Thank you.” I didn’t answer, and eventually she added, “So what now?”
“I’m still the wolf,” I said, curling into a ball and huddling in the corner. “My strength will return soon. It’s better if you’re gone when that happens.”
Harlyn sighed, and walked across the small tunnel room to collect her weapons, paused briefly as she passed by me, then left me alone.
Rawk was waiting for me as I left the palace, and I invited Loelle to ride with me, an offer she accepted only when I pointed out the fighting still happening around the palace. Once we were in the air, she touched my shoulder. “Take us to Woodcourt.”
“I need to counsel with my soldiers.”
“You need to speak with Tenger. He begged me to come here to find you before it’s too late.”