“How did you figure that?” Now I turned to him, angrier than when we’d fought. “Have I set terms for whether Harlyn gets to live, maybe offered to kill her myself? Have we spent hour after hour debating whether Harlyn’s life has any value beyond her use in battle? Will your own life be threatened if anyone discovers your feelings for Harlyn?”
Gabe looked down. “No, none of those.”
I frowned at him. “Then our situations are very different, and you do not understand. But if you want to try, begin here: I did not give Kestra a piece of my heart. She is my heart.”
Harlyn motioned to me again and I left Gabe, but when I had almost reached her, the heads of my cavalry rode through the gate. I offered Harlyn my arm and together we went to greet Commander Reese.
He looked in better condition than most others who had returned this morning, so I hoped he was bringing good news, but that didn’t appear to be so. He shook his head, dismounted, and gave me a low bow. “We lost ten riders. My first officer, Edgar, was among them. And maybe ten doesn’t seem like many compared to the losses others have taken, but it’s a tenth of my cavalry.”
“I’m very sorry.” The weight of responsibility for those losses was heavy on my shoulders. “I tried everything I could to keep the worst of the battle from reaching you.”
“I can see that.” Reese gave a deep sigh. “If you wish to remain our king, then you must trust us, as you ask us to trust you. We are soldiers. We are part of this battle too.”
“I’m glad
to hear it, because this is not over. I still need you to keep our riders alert.”
“Our riders?” Commander Reese reached out to shake my hand, and for the first time I saw a sincere hint of respect in his eyes. “Yes, our riders are at your service.”
“We thank you,” Harlyn said. “But for now, you all must rest. Use any resources from Woodcourt that you need.”
“Thank you … my king.” He bowed to Harlyn. “And my future queen.”
Harlyn only lowered her eyes. “Can we go somewhere private?”
Our walk into the library was long and unusually quiet. I couldn’t help but think of how Gabe must be watching us, and hating me for leaving with her. How he must be wishing he could hit me again.
Once we entered the library, before Harlyn said another word, she checked that every door was closed and even glanced up at the windows high above us to be sure we were alone. When she finished, she turned to me, looking as nervous as I’d ever seen her. “Don’t get upset. The wound is gone.”
My brows furrowed. “What wound?”
Harlyn removed her cloak. Her dress was torn in several places, but most prominently, one sleeve was bloodstained. Her blood, I guessed.
“The wound is gone,” she repeated.
“How?” The only possible explanation seemed … impossible. “Kestra?”
She nodded. “You’ll be angry with me for most of this story, so I must remind you that I was only following orders you agreed to.”
“You tried to kill Kestra.”
“I fully intended to do it, and I still wonder if I should have done it when I had the chance. She was weakened—Joth had taken nearly all her strength. I don’t know how she found it in herself to continue running from me, but she did. Then she entered a tunnel that I think is used by Endrick’s Ironhearts. It was small and dark—”
“And Kestra became afraid.”
Harlyn frowned. “Yes. And although I had the opportunity, I couldn’t harm her when she was like that.” She shrugged. “Then, when I finally worked up the courage to do it, I literally couldn’t. The disk that I had intended for her backfired, and I shot myself instead.”
My brow wrinkled. “How did that happen?”
“Half-lives. They would’ve done worse, but Kestra tried to persuade them to give loyalty to her instead. I don’t know if it worked, but they didn’t bother us after that. And then she did something that caused my wound to begin healing. She saved my life in there.”
“But I thought—”
“I think in her weakened state, the corruption itself was weakened and she was … like the old Kestra, or the Kestra that I think she must have been once.”
Hope filled me. Perhaps Loelle was wrong and there was a way to heal Kestra. But in Harlyn’s very next words, all hope vanished, leaving me emptier than if she had never spoken.
She said, “By this morning, Kestra’s strength had returned and, with it, every bit of corruption I’d seen before.” Harlyn looked up at me. “I saw it for myself, Simon. When she is weak, the corruption fades. But it’s always there inside her.”