With a loud clang, Zoe set her glass down. She turned, eyebrow raised, waiting for me to elaborate.
“I can’t really explain it all over dinner,” I added. I’ll be explaining it all to Lenny for years.
“Nice.” Zoe scoffed. She looked around the kitchen as if lost, then rounded on me. “Where the fuck is my coat in this goddamn fucking castle?” When I had nothing to offer (because I didn’t know, Lenny had designed the entire place), she brushed past me. “Whatever…I’ll buy a new one.”
“But listen.” I grabbed her arm lightly. “I want to explain. I want to tell you everything. And the important part is that it’s over.”
Her glare went from my hand to my eyes. “What were you, some kind of drug kingpin?”
“Not exactly.” I released my grip, thinking about her words. I didn’t think it really mattered what I did; what mattered were the consequences. I could tell her about GEM, but that wouldn’t suddenly make what I’d done null and void. Lenny and I were still trying to figure that out.
“You know, I had to accept a lot of things, Vic; Lissie and I both did.” Zoe folded her arms, glare harsh. “We had to accept that you were dead, but we also had to accept that our already messed up friend was going to be permanently fucked. We accepted it though, because that’s what friends do. When she left our house and went to Grace’s we didn’t get mad, we accepted it. When she stopped responding to our texts, we were prepared to accept the worst. You know what I won’t do? I won’t accept this.”
When Zoe finished talking, I let her words hang heavy around my neck. Like everything else in my new life, they weren’t something I could easily fix, but they were something that would be in the forefront of my mind from now on.
“Zoe…” I exhaled, looking around at my castle. Stainless steel was my only requirement, because of the germs, then Lenny went and had her field day. Everything was white, but there were splashes of color here and there. Isn’t there some saying about empty castles and kings? “You’re my closest friend.”
I watched as Zoe’s tongue moved around in her mouth, then she dropped her arms with a sigh. “I don’t know what the fuck I’m supposed to do with that information.” I shrugged, because I didn’t either. It just felt like something she needed to know.
“I’m your closest friend?” she asked. I nodded. “When is my birthday?”
“December second,” I replied instantly.
Her brow quirked. “You’ve never gotten me a present.”
“Birthday presents are fucking stupid.” Why should someone get a present for simply existing? Lenny and I still hadn’t come to an agreement on that. She thought existing was the biggest reason to get a present.
Zoe’s eyes narrowed. “Where was I born?”
“Missouri.”
“The town.”
“It doesn’t have a name.”
Zoe waved a hand, unimpressed. “You could have looked all of that up in the creepy way you do.”
I laughed. “Fine, ask me something I couldn’t have looked up.”
“Why did we choose the name Thea?”
“You tell everyone it was your grandmother’s name.” At my answer, Zoe gave me a tenuous smile. She patted me on the shoulder and started to walk back out to the patio. I wasn’t finished, though. “As a kid, Lissie had a doll named Thea. Before her parents divorced, when they fought, she would cling to Thea. They divorced, the house was sold, and Thea was lost. The first girl you loved was named Thea…around the time Lissie lost the doll. It was unrequited.”
Zoe spun around. “We’ve never told anyone that.”
“You guys talked about it, though, before the baby was born. We all went out, everyone was getting drunk. You and Lissie were together and weren’t drinking, out of solidarity for the baby’s mother even though she was—”
“States away, yeah, get to the point.”
“You didn’t think I was paying attention, but you guys started talking about names. Lissie joked about Thea, then it all came tumbling out. You both thought it was fate.”
“That is super fucking creepy, Vic.” I shrugged at her. I’d never had friends. I’d never had family. Lenny had called me creepy many times, whether jokingly or seriously I couldn’t always tell. Zoe had just called me creepy. Creepy has a lot of different definitions, but generally it means you’re an outsider, someone who doesn’t understand, impinging on a world that isn’t your own.
No one taught me how to love, but I did my best to do it anyway. Grabbing up our glasses, I put them in the sink so I could head upstairs. I wouldn’t waste any more of her time. They could have a girls night or some shit; they d
idn’t need the dead ruining the party. That was pretty fucking creepy.
“But also sweet, I guess.” I stopped, foot on the stair. My black hair fell over my face as I leaned forward, unsure if I should turn around. “It’s all over?” she asked. I craned my head slightly, just so I could see her expression. Zoe’s glower had only lighted a little, but there was the hint of a smile.