Let Me Go (Owned 2)

Chad squinted at us then shrugged. “I guess that’s it. You’ve seen everything. I’ve got to head to school in an hour, so, uh”—he placed his hands in his pockets and teetered on his heels—“just have the cash ready by the first of the month.” Without another word Chad disappeared into the room across from ours, shutting the door.

Vera and I exchanged looks. “He’s a bit off his rocker, right?” Vera asked.

“Maybe that’s how people act out here,” I offered, not wanting to believe the man we were agreeing to live with was even remotely odd.

Vera nodded. “Maybe…” She shook her head, replacing her frown with a smile. “Let’s move in!”

“Do you even have anything to move in?” I certainly didn’t. All I had was a backpack with a few changes of clothes and a toothbrush I’d bummed off a church in Colorado.

“You know what I mean. I’m checking out my room!” Vera disappeared into her bedroom, leaving me in the living room. I stared at the open door that led into what was now my room. From my vantage point in the living room I could discern the outlines of a few objects, but not much. I should have gotten it over with and just walked in, but it was the oddest thing; my feet were somehow stuck to the floor.

Like I’d stepped in taffy.

I’d never had a room. I mean, I’d had a room that I’d slept in before, but never my own room. Daddy was very clear on that. It wasn’t my room, it was his room. Everything belonged to him. Even I belonged to him. Eli was the only one who’d ever made me question that; he was the only person who’d ever made me think I could belong to myself.

Vera squealed, startling me from my thoughts and memories.

“What’s wrong?” I yelled, still not moving from my spot.

“I have a closet and a dresser. Do you?” I couldn’t answer her as I still hadn’t gone into my room. Twisting my mouth into a determined frown, I stepped from the spot and into the room.

My room.

The walls were blank, no pictures or anything to speak of. Three were painted bone white while one was a stark contrast in aqua. The room had only one window and it overlooked the street. If I craned my head hard enough I could faintly make out the blue of the ocean. The ocean. The actual blue, vast, and apparently never-ending ocean.

Mostly I just saw the deep black tar of the street, dotted with cars of all colors. People walked along the pavement, some dressed only in swimsuits, as they made their way to the beach. They were smiling, pushing their friends, and laughing. I turned from the window and back to my room.

I still couldn’t believe it. My room. To do anything I wanted with. The bed was already made with white sheets and a faded blue quilt on top. A light wooden dresser, like the color of wheat grass in the noonday sun, was pushed up against the wall. A long mirror hung over the back of a door. I went to that door and opened it.

“I have a closet!” I called back to Vera.

“And a dresser?” she questioned.

“And a dresser!” I replied. Seemingly content, Vera didn’t reply and silence hung in the air. Faint sounds from the street outside drifted in. Like whispers of happiness, I could hear people’s laughter and joy. As I sat down on the faded quilt, messing up the neatly folded corners of the bed, I couldn’t help but think it was too good to be true.

SIX YEARS BEFORE

“Wait, hold up! What’s ya name?”

I paused. Every fiber in my being told me to run. I was already going to get a beating for leaving the house. The day was so beautiful, though. The sun was shining bright and the trees were just now blooming. The blossoms only bloomed for a few weeks before disappearing into green leaves.

I just wanted to smell it, feel it, before it all disappeared. Suddenly I found myself walking down the street, exploring things I had no right to explore. I was almost four blocks away from my house, the farthest I had ever been. I kept expecting something terrible to happen, but it never did, so I continued walking.

The sounds were incredible. I heard children laughing and playing. The cars zoomed by me, their speed whipping my hair in front of my face. Birds chirped and talked with one another. In the distance I heard someone mowing their lawn. I even heard people cussing!

It was… surreal. Even the air around me vibrated like a dream. It was so, so much better than a dream, though.

The boy had been following me for a block before he spoke. I thought about running away and back home. I didn’t know him. Then again, I didn’t know anyone.

I turned to face him. “Grace. My name is Grace.”

“Grace…” The boy rolled my name around in his mouth like hard candy. “That’s a nice name, Grace. My name’s Eli.” Eli smiled at me like he had a secret. I felt uncomfortable, hot and cold at the same time. I looked around, expecting someone to run up and tell me I shouldn’t be talking to him, yet all I saw were people going about their regular spring routine.

I spun around and walked away from the boy, not wanting to push my luck.

“Wait, Grace.” Eli grabbed my arm and pulled me back. I looked at his hand upon my wrist in horror. He was touching me. I was unclean. If Daddy found out, I was more than in trouble, I was dead.

I yanked my arm back, terrified.