The memory makes me smile. “I was so angry with you. What was Adeline right about?”
“She said you were secretive when it came to your relationships, and I agree with her. You know all about my past marriage, but I know nothing about your romantic past.”
“That’s because there’s not really much to tell. What do you want to know?”
“Have you ever been in love?”
I have to dig deep into the trenches of my memory to answer that question. I’m not one of those women who fall in and out of love five times a year. I take years to be in love with one man. A case example being Thomas.
“Of course, I have. His name was Alex, and he worked for a marketing farm. He was ambitious as hell, and marriage was not on his list of priorities. Which was cool except he only let me know his views after we’d been dating for three years.”
“What a jerk,” Thomas says hotly. “I know I have issues with long-term relationships, but you should come clean and not give someone false hopes.”
Hearing him admit that he has issues with long-term relationships hurts the slightest bit. It’s a reminder that no matter how good it gets between us, we’ll never be permanent.
“What about you? Before Tessa?” I ask him.
He grins. “You’ll never believe this, but I never had a long-term relationship before Tessa. She hadn’t either.” He shrugs. “Maybe that was the problem. Maybe we needed more experience.”
For all his worldly experiences, Thomas has had very little variety when it comes to love. Listening to him, it’s easy to see now why the thought of long-term relationships frightens him. The one and only time he gave his heart away, it was broken. Then just when he was healing and trying to move on with his life, he found out that his marriage was not what he thought it was.
It will take a big leap of faith for Thomas to believe in love again.
Chapter 33
Thomas
I’m reading an online medical journal when my laptop beeps with a new email. I click on it, and my heart beats faster when I see that it’s from the recruitment agency.
“Yes!” My voice echoes in the living room as I read the email letting me know that I am the top candidate for the position at Mercy Hospital.
I’m beyond thrilled. I’m ecstatic. I shoot them an email to formally accept the position and shut down my laptop. It’s been months of grueling interviews, and sometimes I’d lost hope that I would get it. I feel as if I’ve run a marathon and I’ve just crossed the finish line.
I glance at the time. It’s four. Cora has two more hours on her shift. I’m too jittery to wait until she gets home to share the news with her. I’ll go and have a drink at The Caroline to celebrate.
I sprint upstairs and swap my shorts for a pair of denim trousers. My black T-shirt is decent, and after grabbing my car keys, I head out. I take the long route to avoid traffic. It takes me by Cora’s apartment building, and as I drive by, I’m surprised and worried to see how fast they’re moving. Everything looks perfect from the outside. There’s no sign there had been a fire only months ago. In fact, it looks ready for people to move back in. I try to imagine Cora not in my house, and a sick feeling comes over me. I’ve gotten used to having her around, and when she leaves, it’ll take time, but I’ll get used to not having her around.
At The Caroline, I park next to Cora’s car and make my way to the front entrance. The air is buzzing with conversation, and the bar is already three-quarters full. Every time I’ve come for a drink, it’s been like that. Ian and Caroline hit the jackpot with the location and ambiance of the bar. It’s patronized by professionals like me looking for a nice classy joint to have a drink and a conversation.
I don’t see Cora when I enter, but as soon as I slide onto a barstool, I see her walking from the kitchen carrying a bowl. It’s as though she senses my presence because she glances to the right, and our gazes meet. A look of joy flits across her face. I grin like an idiot and blow her a discreet kiss.
“Hey, Thomas,” Tom, the giant of a bartender says. “Nice to see you. What can I get you?”
“Hi, I’ll have a cold beer, please.”
I swirl my chair around and watch Cora as she goes to another table with four men. She takes their order and laughs a lot as she does so. I can tell they are flirting with her, and a sharp stab of jealousy goes through me. I swirl my chair back to find Tom holding my beer and staring at me. Embarrassment washes over me.