So what the fuck was that pain?
I start to doze off again, and minutes later, I wake up with another searing pain. This one is immediately followed by a gush of water. I push myself off the bed, and most of the water drips to the floor.
I’m officially in labor now, but from my parental classes, I know that first babies take hours to show up. Most likely, my munchkin will show up sometime tomorrow. I make the bed with fresh sheets and clean myself up, after which I slip into bed again.
The pains come at regular intervals, and I forget to time them, or rather, I don’t see a need to as I still have hours to go. I snuggle into bed and fall into a pattern of dozing, waking up from the contractions and falling back asleep. I do this until I realize that the intervals have grown shorter, and I’m not managing to sleep before another pain shoots through me. That’s when it hits me that I need to get to the hospital. I swing my legs off the bed, and another pain shoots through me.
This one is a notch higher, and it leaves me feeling as though I’ve been hit by a truck. When it’s over, I sit on the bed to catch my breath. I get up, and as soon as I do, I want to sit back down. The action of getting dressed, going downstairs, getting into my car, and then driving to the hospital feels insurmountable.
I have no concept of time, and it feels as if I’m locked up in this world by myself. I reach for my phone inside the bag. Guilt floods me when I see six missed calls from Thomas. It’s only ten at night, and it feels like midnight.
I call him back, and he answers on the first ring. Hearing his voice is such a relief, and to my shame, I burst into tears.
“Cora, what is it? Talk to me,” Thomas says.
“I think I’m in labor.” The second the words are out, a contraction comes over me, and it spreads over my back and to my ass.
I hold the phone away as I try and breathe through it as we were taught in prenatal classes. When it’s over, I bring the phone to my ear again.
“I don’t think I can drive myself to the hospital,” I tell Thomas.
“No, you can’t.” His voice is terse. “I’m going to disconnect the call now and get an ambulance for you. Don’t worry about the front door. I’ll tell them where to find the spare key.”
Another contraction comes, and this one comes with triple the pain. I scream.
“Fuck, Cora, I think the baby is on the way. Oh, God. If you can, grab some clean towels and lie on them.” He disconnects the call.
The pain fades away, and I rouse myself and do as he says. I grab some towels and arrange them on the bed and lie back down. Another pain comes, and my phone vibrates. I manage to grab it before the pain becomes unbearable.
“The ambulance is on the way.” Thomas’s voice sounds like it’s coming from far. “Breathe, Cora. You’ll be okay.”
Then something in my body changes, and an overwhelming urge to push comes over me. A deep guttural moan leaves my mouth.
“Are you pushing?” Thomas shouts. “Listen, sweetheart, don’t push. Breathe through it.”
“I can’t ...” Thomas has no fucking idea what he’s talking about. I don’t care whether he’s a doctor. He has never experienced what I’m going through now. Asking me not to push is like telling me to hold back a poop when it’s halfway out.
Two more pushes, and something soft and slippery lands on the towels. I glance between my legs. “Oh my God.” She has a full head of dark silky hair. “Hello, sweetheart.”
I lift her gently onto my stomach while taking a quick peek to verify that she’s indeed a girl. I’m wrapped up in a world of my own as I cuddle my baby.
“Cora, what’s going on? Talk to me.”
I remember Thomas and pick up my phone. “We have a beautiful baby girl,” I tell him. I can barely see her as tears stream down my eyes.
“Is she breathing? Has she cried?”
I laugh with wonder. “She’s staring at me as if trying to figure out who I am. Oh, Thomas, you should see her; she’s so beautiful.”
At that moment, my bedroom door bursts open, and I see Martin. Before I can recover from seeing him in our bedroom, the paramedics enter carrying a stretcher.
The last thing I hear Thomas say is, “I can’t believe that you actually gave birth alone.”
Chapter 37
Thomas
“Hurry up, man,” I tell the Uber guy as he drives me from the airport to the hospital. “My wife gave birth last night.”