That was the last thing I was expecting him to say. “You mean after the maternity cover?”
“Yes, I want you to stay on the team. This article really impressed me. It was insightful and well written. You rewrote history when you turned it in nearly a week before it was due. I can’t wait to see what you’ve got for us next.”
Usually, I’d be lapping up the praise, but Bernie’s words just tasted sour in my mouth. A full-time job at the Post was everything I’d worked toward my entire life, and Audrey’s story might be my Watergate. I should be snatching Bernie’s hand off and wearing a grin the size of China. But I felt nothing but empty.
Twenty-Six
Nathan
I went through the arguments to myself again. One article in one newspaper couldn’t define me. I’d been up against bad odds before and triumphed. I would just have to work harder, do better, show them they’d be fools to get rid of me.
As far as I was concerned, it was business as usual. I was back behind my desk, acting like the article published last night had never made it into print.
I’d trusted Madison. I thought she’d known me. And I’d been completely blindsided when I’d read the profile. The only thing I’d heard from her since was two words in an email.
I’m sorry.
My stomach churned as snippets from the article raced to the front of my mind. She’d detailed how some people weren’t suited to big business and suggested I focus on small start-ups. Astro had been a small start-up once—I’d bloody built this firm from nothing. How dare she say I should just abandon it and move on? She’d said I liked to get my hands dirty and shunned the externally facing role, which may have a hint of truth in it. But I did every part of the job, took the good with the bad, the nitty gritty and the bit where I talked to shareholders and the market. She’d seen plenty of evidence of that.
I’d thought she knew me. And I knew her. How could I have been so wrong?
A knock at my office door shook me out of my tangle of frustration and Gretel appeared in the doorway. I tried not to groan but she really was the last person I wanted to see. I didn’t want to be berated by her for something that was entirely Madison’s responsibility.
I held up my hand. “I’m not having a discussion with you about this,” I said. “I gave her full access. I can’t be responsible for what she wrote.” I busied myself at my emails so I didn’t have to look at her scornful face.
She slumped in the chair opposite my desk. “I know.”
Surprised at her response, I glanced over at her. Her shoulders were slightly hunched—a total departure from the ramrod straight posture she usually demonstrated. And she was looking at me with a blank expression, her eyes dull and a bit listless. “What do you mean, you know?”
“You did everything I asked,” she replied. “You gave her access. You didn’t try to control the story.”
“Are you saying it’s not as bad as I think it is?” She can’t have read the same article if that’s what she came to tell me.
“No, it’s just as bad as you think it is.”
I might find Gretel irritating and her job unnecessary, but she’d always been honest with me and normally I appreciated that. Today she could have taken the edge off. “So, you’re telling me we can spin it and it’s not a big deal?” I’d expected her to come in on a whirlwind of energy, with a presentation on what to do next. But I wasn’t getting plan vibes from her.
“Honestly, Nathan, I have no idea. But I know this—she gave an honest account. It wasn’t what we wanted her to write, but there it is.”
“You’re not going to call up the editor and put pressure on him to change the slant of the article?” That’s what PR people were supposed to do, wasn’t it?
“Absolutely not. That would be immoral.”
She might be right but I was surprised she’d said it. “If it makes you feel any better,” she said, “I think it’s bullshit.”
“Madison’s article?”
She winced. “No, actually, I think she’s pretty spot on with that. I didn’t think so twenty-four hours ago. I was ready to hunt her down and feed her to the dog I don’t have. But having slept on it, what she said wasn’t rude. And it wasn’t wrong.”
Great. That wasn’t what I needed to hear from the person who was meant to be helping me weather this storm. “So, what exactly is bullshit?” I snapped.
“The entire reason I’m here. It’s insane. Okay, so maybe you like to be in the weeds too much. And maybe you have to be cajoled to charm the shareholders and business press.” She was full of compliments today. “But firstly, there are plenty of CEOs who are the same and I don’t see them bringing home the kind of results that Astro does under your leadership.”