“You’re right,” I sighed. “We’ll figure it out. In the meantime, when we’re just with our bands, I think we need a little distance. If we get private and public proximity mixed up too soon, we’ll accidentally give ourselves away.”
Tegan frowned. “Okay. So…don’t sit next to each other?”
“Yeah. Friendly but not too friendly.”
He slipped his fingers under my gray sweats and grabbed my ass. “Okay. Got it.”
I rested my forehead on his and closed my eyes before I gave in to temptation and asked a really stupid question like, “What happens after the tour?”
I had a feeling I knew the answer. There was no point in future-tripping. What we had in private was good….No, it was amazing. I didn’t want to jeopardize my time with Tegan by asking for more than either of us was prepared to give.
Tegan
Confession time. I liked Declan.
A lot. As in…I probably had a crush on him. And it was probably mutual.
There’d always been an undercurrent between us. For as long as any band or crew member knew us, it had been hostile, and more recently, we were polite and vaguely friendly. Now we were…different.
I couldn’t say how exactly. I just knew I liked being around him.
The moment Dec appeared, I felt feverish, warm all over, and stupid with desire. It was probably a good thing we agreed to avoid unnecessary contact. I would have embarrassed myself immediately.
I didn’t want to avoid him or ignore him anymore. I wanted to study him. I wanted to examine the parts of him I remembered and compare them to the new things I’d learned.
Here’s the thing about Dec. He was a people magnet. He changed the temperature in any given room he occupied. There was no such thing as a careless smile or an off-the-cuff comment with him. He didn’t do flippant well. He engaged completely and went out of his way to be kind and courteous. I used to think he was just a kiss-ass, but I came to realize it was a byproduct of being an only child of a mostly absent parent.
Dec spent his formative years as an honorary Monroe. My family…my mom especially, used to include him in a lot of events and activities, but he was an outsider. If I acted like a brat, my folks might have sent me to my room, but they could’ve sent Dec home. And home was lonely. He’d used charm and interest to keep his place at the table. He still did.
However, I noticed things about him that I hadn’t when we were younger.
Dec burned brighter than average people, but he needed his downtime too. He wrote constantly, composed melodies out of thin air, and seemed to find inspiration in everything imaginable from fallen leaves to a dog’s high-pitched bark. And somehow he managed to fit his observations into soulful lyrics that hinted at the genius he’d joked about weeks ago.
He saw the world differently than others. Colors were richer, sound was heightened, and any form of movement might spark a symphony. He could sit for hours alternately staring into space or manically typing notes onto his cell or writing in a notebook. I hadn’t believed him when he said he didn’t have many friends, but it kind of made sense. He was consumed by music. He didn’t make time for anything else.
Well…other than me.
Maybe I was his muse. If so, it was a mutual condition. Dec inspired me. He moved me, made me think, and made me more aware of my surroundings.
He seemingly had that effect on his fans too.
The reviews from our kickoff show in LA were outstanding.
“‘The masterful performances of Jealousy and Zero brought the house down. Jealousy opened for LA’s new darling indie band, Zero, and gave them a run for their money.’ ” Charlie glanced up from his iPad to cast an amused look at Justin, Johnny, Ky, and me. “What did I tell you? A week ago, you were in danger of has-been status and today you’re LA’s darling. And Dec and the boys are up next. The reviewer, who was not Ky’s dad, by the way, was particularly enamored with Declan.”
“Who was she?” Gill teased.
I chuckled as I hiked my duffel bag over my shoulder and stole a glance at Declan standing a few feet away with his bandmates behind a fuckton of luggage.
This was it. D-day.
The road tour was officially about to begin. Both bands and our entourages huddled around Charlie in the studio parking lot, awaiting last-minute instructions before our buses left for San Diego.
“He gushed about his stage presence, crowd appeal, and the beautifully crafted songs. Particularly ‘The Magic,’ ” Charlie continued. “And he mentions the classy nod from Zero…um, let’s see…oh, here it is. ‘Zero’s drummer played on the hauntingly gorgeous song. Tegan Monroe’s presence seemed like a symbolic welcome of sorts. The gesture tied the two powerhouse performances together and set an unexpected tone of kinship and camaraderie. By the time Justin Cuevas and the boys from Zero took the stage, the fans were wild with excitement. And Zero did not disappoint. Justin led the first set with’—blah, blah, blah. You don’t need to hear the rest. We need Justin to be able to fit his head on the bus.”