“I’m sorry, but I can’t marry you, Thad. I think you’re a very special man, and I’m extremely flattered that you asked me, but it wouldn’t be fair for me to accept when I don’t truly believe it’s right for either of us.”
He sighed lightly. “I still think we’d have been a great couple. But I accept your decision, of course. I’m sorry it didn’t work out.”
“So am I,” she said candidly, a hard lump in her throat.
Thad squeezed the back of his neck, then dropped his arm and straightened his shoulders. “If you don’t mind my asking—who is he?”
“Who is who?” she asked cautiously, studying him through her lashes.
Smiling crookedly, he shrugged. “I was told you were with another man at a bar last weekend. I thought perhaps it was just a friend, but something I’ve heard in your voice when we’ve talked since made me wonder if there was more to it. Now I suspect I was right.”
She cleared her throat before answering candidly. “I was with someone Saturday night. It wasn’t planned exactly. I wasn’t sneaking around seeing anyone behind your back or anything like that. I fully intended to tell you everything when you returned.” Well, maybe not everything. “You remember me telling you about the guy I dated in college?”
He looked as though a lightbulb went on in his head, perhaps as he recalled her little speech before the fund-raiser. “The one who became a police officer?”
She hadn’t told him much more than that when they’d exchanged a few tales of past loves over dinner and drinks one night not so long ago. Maybe one too many drinks. “Yes.”
“You’re seeing him again?”
“We sort of ran into each other. It’s a long story, and I’ll spare you the details. But Gavin isn’t the main reason I have to turn down your proposal, Thad. I don’t know for certain if he and I will continue to see each other. It’s just, well, I’ve realized that it wouldn’t be fair of me to marry you when I’m not able to totally commit to you. I can’t walk away from my business. Sink or swim in the long run, it means too much to me. And I couldn’t do justice to you if I’m not free to travel and attend all these functions with you and everything else you need from a wife and a partner in your future. I’m sorry. I hope we can still be friends,” she added, because such a speech was always supposed to conclude that way.
“I hope so, too.” He leaned over to brush a kiss across her lips. “Be happy, Jenny. And if you change your mind...you know where to find me.”
She wouldn’t change her mind, she thought as she closed her door behind him. And he knew it. She doubted it would be long before he started seeing someone else. And while it made her a little sad to think that their relationship was over, she had no other regrets about her decision.
Apparently she was more like her mother than she’d ever realized. And despite what her grandmother or anyone else might think, maybe that wasn’t such a bad thing, after all.
* * *
The drive up the hill to the cabin was much nicer in pretty weather. Emerald-green leaves rustled in a slight breeze against a brilliantly blue, cloudless sky on this Saturday afternoon. A few trees showed fresh gashes from having limbs broken off in the storm winds earlier in the month. The road was still bumpy, pocked with new holes left from the floodwaters. Much tamer now than it had been when she’d seen it last, the river ran cheerily alongside the rising road. The only storm raging now was the one inside Jenny’s heart as she neared the cabin.
This was probably the most reckless thing she had ever done in her life. And it frightened her to her toes. But here she was.
She parked in front of the cabin. She didn’t see anyone around, but she knew Gavin was here.
She climbed slowly out of the car, her new, bright green sneakers crunching against the gravel drive as she moved toward the front door. It was a warm day, and she’d dressed accordingly in a sleeveless top and cropped pants. A bag of similarly casual clothing sat in the backseat of her car. She was prepared to stay overnight, if things went well.
She was just about to knock when a hammering sound from around back caught her attention. Following the sound, she stepped off the porch and walked around the cabin. Gavin had his back to her as he hammered at something he was building with long wooden boards.
“At least I’m not waking you up this time,” she said, speaking over the noise. “But you did look very appealing all rumpled and sleepy.”
He froze, then turned slowly to face her, the hammer dangling at his side. He still looked sexy as all get-out in his loose jeans and damp tee, both covered in sawdust. “Jenny?”
It was taking everything she had to keep her posture relaxed, her tone casual, her smile easy. “What are you building?”
For a moment, he looked as though he couldn’t remember. “A window box,” he said after a pause. “My mom thought some flowers would look nice under the kitchen window.”
“She’s right. It would look nice.”
He shook his head, impatiently putting an end to small talk. “Jenny, why are you here?”
“I don’t like having important conversations over the phone,” she replied with a shrug. “I tracked down Rob to ask him where I could find you and he told me you were here doing a little maintenance in preparation for your summer renters. I thought about waiting until you were back in Little Rock, but then I decided to invite myself to join you here. I can leave, if you’d rather be alone.”
He dropped the hammer and dusted off his hands without looking away from her face. “I saw your picture in the paper a couple days ago. Avery made sure to show it to me.”
She knew which picture he meant. The photographer had caught her smiling up at Thad as he’d helped her out of his expensive car. Stevie had told her it was the fakest smile in the entire history of fake smiles, but most people would probably not have realized that at first glance
. Had Gavin?