Indulgent Pleasures

“I’ll be gone a lot. I fly out next week and I’ll be traveling non-stop during the entire playoff season. I’ll probably work straight through to the World Series, too.”

She nodded slowly, understanding dawning inside of her. She wouldn’t be seeing him as much. This was the opportunity for him to give her as much time as she wanted. Maybe too much on his part.

Stephanie frowned. Maybe once he was gone he would forget about her, find someone new. Someone prettier and more his type.

Oh, she needed to quit with the pity party. She was the one who was pushing him away. She could only blame herself if he went off and found someone new.

Most women would think she was crazy. She’d been given her opportunity with him and for the moment, she’d turned him down.

“I understand,” she finally said with a small smile. It felt false, her mouth straining at the corners.

“You’re okay with it?”

“Of course, it’s your job. Do I have a choice?”

“I just don’t want to—” He paused, his jaw tightening. She could tell this was hard for him, admitting this and it touched her heart, made her feel even shittier for what she was doing.

But better to be honest with him than lead him down the wrong path, right?

Right?

“I don’t want to lose you,” he said in a rush. “I know I’m probably pushing you so I’m going to lay off. I just want you to know that if you’re okay with it, I’m not going anywhere in regards to you, to us. I want to continue seeing you.”

“Okay,” Stephanie said slowly, surprise filling her and her stomach fluttered in response.

“You’re really okay with that?”

She nodded. “Yes, of course. I, um, enjoy spending time with you, Justin.”

The relief that shone in his smile made her feel even worse. She was such a fool, most likely messing up something that could end up being truly beautiful.

“I enjoy spending time with you too, Stephanie. A lot.” He kissed her again, this time his mouth more insistent, his tongue thrusting into her mouth, tangling with hers. His hard body crowded her, wrapped her tight in his embrace and her body responded in kind.

One more night. She’d give herself one more night and then she needed to distance herself from him. It was best, she knew it was best.

So why did she feel like crying?

Chapter Twenty-Three

For the first time in his life, Justin had put his heart on the line and Stephanie still rejected him. Not totally but close enough and he didn’t know what to do next.

Well, he knew what to do next. He’d already said he wanted to continue seeing her and she’d agreed. So if she wanted to continue this why had she been so resistant earlier? Had he come on too strong? Had he moved too fast?

Probably but hell, this had hit him fast, smacking into him out of nowhere. And he wanted to enjoy it, enjoy his time with her, get to know her better and not just sexually. Especially since he was leaving for his new job soon.

He would’ve flown her out to wherever he was on the weekends so they could’ve spent time together. But now he’d force that plan to the backburner for fear of freaking her out.

Shit. He couldn’t believe he was doing this. She had no clue what a big deal this was, revealing his true feelings to her.

And yet again, she threw him for a loop. Completely unpredictable, no way could he figure this woman out.

Maybe that was part of her appeal.

He’d led her back to his bedroom so he could show her how he felt versus telling her. Had a feeling he’d fucked it up royally with his choice of words but hell, he didn’t know what he was doing. He was a relationship newbie. Something that was hard to admit.

So instead of screwing it up more and inserting his foot deeper into his mouth, he decided to cup her beautiful face in his hands and kiss her, his thumbs stroking her cheeks. She responded immediately, her lips parting, tongue darting out to meet his. She moved closer, her arms slipping around his waist, holding him tight and he wondered what it was she didn’t like about him.

Always she responded as if she were made for him. There was an ease between them that was both comforting and arousing. Did she not see that? Did she not feel it?