Indulgent Pleasures

“No, thanks.” Stephanie told herself to walk out. Go back to her bedroom and shut the door, tune out the game. She didn’t need any more reminders of Justin and what she didn’t have. She had enough of those reminders bouncing around in her head on constant rotation.

But she sat down next to Sia, her eyes glued to the TV. Her hand automatically sank into the Cheeto bag and grabbed a bunch, her fingers covered in Cheeto dust. Sia giggled, seemingly glad to have someone share in her baseball/Cheeto love and the both of them glanced at each other, little smiles on their faces.

Her heart ached for Justin, though. Reminders of him were everywhere, calling to her throughout the day, every single day and she couldn’t shut him out even if she wanted to. He’d become such a part of her life, her routine and she missed him with a pain that was physically debilitating.

Of course, there were also his calls. And he called her every single day without fail. Asking about her life, checking up on her, giving her small details as to what was going on with him. He never pushed, he never asked her how she felt about him, about them but she knew what he wanted.

He wanted the two of them back together. And no matter how much she wanted the same thing she wasn’t quite ready to put her heart back on the line again. Not until she was sure how he felt.

“I’ve never seen you watch baseball. Ever,” Stephanie couldn’t help but say again, wondering what Sia’s motive was. Did her roommate want to torture her? Make her crazy with wanting Justin back in her life? She did that pretty well all by herself. She didn’t need any help.

“I told you, I like watching the playoffs. I like to keep tabs on who’s winning so I know who to root for when the World Series starts.” Sia glanced at the clock on the kitchen wall and stood, stretching her long, thin frame. “I need another beer. I’ll be right back.”

Stephanie shoved another Cheeto in her mouth, her eyes glued to the screen and she watched as a tall, broad shouldered man walked out onto the field. He wasn’t a player, he wore no uniform but he was clad in form fitting jeans and a navy blue polo shirt with the Miners’ emblem just above his heart.

The way he moved was familiar even though he was just a tiny speck on the screen, his back to the camera as he jogged out to the center of the field. But the camera zoomed in and when his voice rumbled out across the stadium Stephanie’s heart nearly froze in her chest.

It was Justin, his face clean-shaven once again and heartbreakingly familiar. And he was talking to the audience.

Oh my God, he was talking about her.

“I am a man on a mission today. Looking for forgiveness from the woman I love with all my heart,” he continued and she wished she could’ve heard what he said before. “Our relationship has played out in public lately and I wanted to let everyone know that what happened between us, well some of it just isn’t true.”

The rowdy crowd went silent, all of them surely having heard about the articles and the cover story in City Magazine. They wanted to hear what their beloved favorite subject had to say, the former golden boy of the Miners baseball team. She knew the crowd, the fans missed him and she was sure they were eating his every word up with rapt attention.

“It wasn’t just about secret interludes and hot sex on the side.” The crowd whooped and hollered, lots of deep male voices yelling in encouragement and Justin smiled, slowly shaking his head.

“I was actually falling in love with her which I didn’t recognize at first because, well, I’d never been in love before.”

Stephanie touched her hand to her chest, her heart beating triple time. He was declaring his love for her on national TV in front of a live audience. She didn’t know whether to laugh or cry.

“And lately I thought I’d lost her, which let me tell you, people, that wasn’t a pleasant experience to go through. Especially in such a public sense. So I thought I would do this in public, too. Considering she still doesn’t believe a word I say, no matter how hard I try to convince her. So maybe now, by me saying this in front of all of you, she just might believe me.”

“Sia, Sia! You need to come here and see this!” Stephanie waved her hand at the TV when Sia ran back into the living room, a little smile curving her lips.

“What’s going on?” Sia’s expression was one of complete innocence.

“I—I don’t know. But Justin’s talking about me out on the field. He’s talking about our relationship. He says he’s going to do something to prove his love for me but I have no idea what.” Stephanie shook her head, shock coursing through her at what was happening before her.

The phone rang, the actual apartment phone which was rare since they usually used their cells and Sia handed it to her, a full blown and very knowing smile on her face.

Stephanie watched the TV, the worried expression on Justin’s face as he held his phone to his ear. His brows were knit downward and a discernible tick showed on the right side of his jaw. He was nervous, she could tell and when she clicked the talk button on the phone, murmuring a soft hello, the relief on his face was evident.

“Stephanie, it’s me.”

The crowd chuckled and she waved at Sia to get her attention, whispering for her to turn the volume down.

“What are you doing Justin?” Her voice sounded all over the stadium and she wanted to die of mortification. This was so embarrassing.

And also so touching.

“I’m trying to show you much I love you, babe. How much I miss you. Do you miss me?”

“Of course, I do but do you have to do this on national TV? In front of a huge crowd?” She really couldn’t believe this was happening.

He laughed, the sound of it warming her insides. “Yes all of the above. I miss you Stephanie, so damn much. I don’t want to live my life without you anymore.”

“Oh Justin,” she sighed and she closed her eyes for the briefest moment.