“Name?”
“Fisher.”
Dierdre emitted a deep chuckle. “Oh, Mr. Fisher! What a perfect pairing of client and attorney! And I suppose you’ve come to propose a deal?”
“Well, this sort of thing is really a waste of the court’s time—not to mention yours—and since Mr. Fisher is contrite and unlikely to repeat—”
“Mr. Fisher has already repeated,” Dierdre said. “That’s why I caught the case instead of one of the rookies.”
“Yes, I’m aware of that, but—”
“And the cop in question—Mr. Fisher’s victim—missed two days of duty because of his injury.”
“Mr. Fisher is very sorry about that. He was very drunk at the time, and—”
“Which is why he was stopped in the first place,” Dierdre replied. She consulted a sheet of paper. “A two-point-oh reading on the Richter scale,” she said. “Judge Goldstein is going to just love that.”
“Judge Goldstein is hearing the case?” Stone’s heart sank. Goldstein’s wife had been injured in a collision with a drunk driver a couple of years back, and he was known as a hanging judge where DUIs were concerned.
“Isn’t that lucky?” Dierdre said. “What sort of deal did you have in mind, Stone?”
“I was thinking a written apology to the officer and community service,” Stone said hopefully. It was only an opening gambit.
“Tell you what: If he pleads out, I won’t ask for the death penalty.”
“Heh, heh,” Stone said.
“I’m glad you find this amusing. So do I.”
“Come on, Dierdre, give me a break here, will you?”
“The poor cop didn’t get much of a break, did he? There he was, just doing his duty, protecting the public from a driver too drunk to stand up straight—”
“All right, spare me,” Stone said, throwing up his hands in surrender. “What can you do for me, Dierdre?”
“How about three to five in Attica?” she proposed.
“Dierdre, please. Let’s be realistic; nobody died.”
“Have you ever been kicked in the balls, Stone?”
“Once, a long time ago.”
“I’m glad you had the experience. I was going to do it myself, just so you’d know the pain involved. Was it fun?”
“No, it hurt a lot.”
“Funny, that’s what the cop said. He’ll be using a cane to make his court appearance today.”
“Why don’t we spare him the court appearance, Dierdre? Make me an offer I can take to my client.”
“Six months and no license for five years.”
“Dierdre . . .”
“He’s lucky I don’t want his license for life.”
“Dierdre . . .”