Crown Prince's Bought Bride
Page 69
He jerked away from her. ‘Dio mio!’ he bit out, his hands falling from her waist.
She dropped her hands, shifted sideways away from him as she gulped in several breaths. The sound of the guests’ laughter reminded her where she was.
Remi took another step back, the cloak of diplomacy settling on his face once more. But beneath that look she saw lingering anguished regret. As if he was berating himself for the very thing he’d instigated.
A breeze swept up from the garden, chilling her body. She rubbed at her arms but the cold just intensified.
‘If we’re done with the lesson, can we leave now?’ she asked through stiff lips.
‘Of course.’ His tone was devoid of inflexion, his demeanour staid as he led her back inside.
* * *
Neither of them spoke for the duration of the journey back to the palace and the long minutes it took them to walk back to their adjoining suites. Expecting him to escort her to her bedroom door, Maddie felt her skin grow tight with apprehension when he veered into his living room and strode to the arched windows overlooking the landscaped gardens.
A stone jumped into her throat at the flash of bleakness on his face. His gaze stayed in the middle distance for the longest time before a hard edge replaced the bleakness. When he turned to her, she held her breath, a part of her almost afraid of what he would say.
‘What happened on the balcony shouldn’t have happened.’
Despite the staccato precision of his revelation his anguish was unmistakable. Her insides shrivelled as she watched him wrestle that telling emotion.
There was only one reason behind this disclosure. Guilt.
The sharpest knife pierced her at the thought that he would never stop loving his dead fiancée. Hard on its heels, though, came anger.
‘It was just a kiss, Remi. You won’t burn in hell for it.’
His jaw clenched. ‘Nevertheless, I gave you my word—’
‘I didn’t ask for your word, so don’t you dare beg my forgiveness because you think you’re dishonouring your fiancée’s memory. Or is it something else? Do you hate the fact that you liked it? That your own wife turns you on?’
Icy fury blasted through his eyes. ‘Madeleine—’
She affected a shaky shrug, despite the deep tremors coursing through her body. ‘You’re an intelligent man, Remi. If this meant nothing to you, you wouldn’t be so affected by it. And you wouldn’t deign to speak to me, never mind attempt to dissect it.’
Grey eyes pinned her as he exhaled harshly. ‘You think you have a handle on what makes me tick?’
She laughed. ‘No, I don’t. I’m just going on the evidence before me. We made love. You loved it. Then immediately retreated. Tonight we kissed. You were transported. Now you hate me—and hate yourself for responding to a commoner like me.’
He didn’t move a muscle but he seemed to grow before her, every inch of his majestic being bristling with affront. ‘To hate you I would have to be invested in you, even a small fraction. I’m not. And in future I’ll th
ank you not to attempt to psychoanalyse me.’
The tears she’d striven to hold back all night threatened to break through as the gnawing, traumatising truth took root inside her.
She couldn’t save a marriage that had been doomed from inception. She was better off cutting her losses.
‘You won’t need to worry about that. Not any more,’ she said, a heavy wave of desolation sweeping over her.
She wanted to succumb, wanted to surrender to its oblivion. But she forced herself to stay on her feet as he pinned her with his gaze.
‘What’s that supposed to mean?’
‘It means I won’t be attending the charity polo match tomorrow. In fact you won’t have to suffer my presence for much longer.’
He stiffened, but she caught the tremor that shook through his body. ‘What exactly are you trying to tell me, Madeleine?’
She swallowed, knowing she couldn’t bury her head in the sand any longer. She was pregnant with Remi’s baby. The heir to the Montegovan throne. Finally accepting it filled her with both trepidation and acute joy. She needed time alone to process the news.