Esme had very little doubt she would be doing any resting but, eager to escape his probing scrutiny, she nodded and murmured her thanks.
She passed Fawzi, who bowed suspiciously deeply the moment he spotted her. Walking through the camp, Esme also began to notice the marked difference in the greetings that came her way. Where they’d been open, carefree before, their greetings were now accompanied by respectful bows and almost deferential smiles.
They knew she’d spent the night in Zaid’s bed. They probably knew she’d been sexually innocent. And now they were attempting to place her on a pedestal on which she didn’t belong. The guilt congealing inside her had grown into an unbearable stone by the time she stumbled into her tent.
About to give in to the sobs that bubbled in her throat, she forced them back down when Aisha and Nashwa rushed in after her.
‘His Highness says that you are to rest,’ the older woman said. ‘Aisha will make you some jasmine tea to—’
‘No tea, thank you, Nashwa,’ she said firmly. ‘I just want to lie down for a bit, if that’s okay.’
‘Of course, Madam.’
She glided past her, heading for the bedroom, while Aisha stepped up and gently tugged the scarf from her hand. Aware that the women wouldn’t rest until they felt they’d been of service, Esme succumbed to being attended to, then sighed in relief the moment they retreated.
But the relief didn’t last against the thoughts tearing her mind apart. Her secret wasn’t the kind she could keep to herself, but it also wasn’t the kind she would wish for Zaid to be blindsided by. And then there was the inescapable truth that publicly admitting what she knew about her father’s past would hammer another, possibly irredeemable, nail in his coffin.
She grabbed the nearest pillow and buried her face in it. But as much as her head wanted to wind the clock back to this time yesterday, where the extent of her problems was whether Zaid wanted her or not, her heart wouldn’t allow that wish to remain. Because then she wouldn’t have experienced the most magical hours of her life. And if there was a baby growing inside her... Her breath caught.
She had a little time before she found out one way or the other. Maybe, Zaid too, with time to think, wouldn’t feel so strongly about claiming a child whose mother was a nobody and whose grandfather was a criminal. For all she knew, he might prefer her and her child to exist far away from his kingdom. Then all she would have to worry about was how to protect her baby from the shaky legacy of her past.
The effort it took to block out the mocking voice that ridiculed her thinking that Zaid wouldn’t claim her child finally wore her out. She was staring blankly at the wall of the tent when she heard excited voices, followed by the unmistakeable sound of rotors approaching.
A glance at her phone showed she’d been lying in bed for two hours. Although she wasn’t due to meet with the teachers of the community for another hour, Esme rose, slid off the tunic and went into the bathroom to splash water on her face. She changed into another tunic, this one in a deep blue. She added the accompanying accessories and walked out into the living room, just as Zaid walked in.
His eyes raked her from head to toe, his face unsmiling. ‘You’re dressed to travel. Very good.’
‘Why? Are we going somewhere?’ she asked.
‘Yes, we’re retuning to the Royal Palace.’
She frowned. ‘But we still have a day’s work to finish here. I’m meeting the teachers in an hour.’
‘The report you drew up yesterday was more than sufficient. Any further assessments can be done by other means.’
‘What other means?’
He gestured impatiently. ‘Phone calls. Video conferences. A dozen other different ways. We’re not a backwater tribe, you know.’
‘Of course I know. I wasn’t suggesting that at all.’
‘Then let’s go,’ he commanded, holding out his hand in imperious emphasis when she hesitated.
‘Why do I feel that there’s more going on here than you’re telling me?’
A muscle rippled in his jaw. ‘Because there is. I suggested that we take some time to absorb the possibility that you may be carrying my child. I was wrong to do so. If you are truly carrying my child—’
‘A fact that is still only a possibility...
‘Then we need to put certain arrangements in place,’ he finished as if she hadn’t spoken.
‘What kinds of arrangements?’ she demanded.
‘The kind that you will be apprised of in due course.’
‘So I will be the last one to know?’
‘No, you will be one of the first to know when final decisions have been made.’