She had given up on men after a long-term romance with a married man. Since she’d left him, she’d spent all of her time at work. Work was her everything, requiring her constant devotion without any personal complications to throw a wrench into her well-tuned life.
She rarely spoke to her parents, visiting them every couple of years—or longer if she could manage it. She’d always felt they didn’t understand her.
Other than work and her estranged family, Shannon had me. And I couldn’t be mad at her anymore. Because in her own weird way, she was trying to give me what she had: a sense of control in an otherwise uncontrollable world.
I made my way back into the living room, wandering aimlessly. I circled the end table and picked up the contract, not looking at it, just holding it.
I counted on Shannon because she always told me the truth, even when I may not like what she had to say. She’d said my book was brilliant. And she must believe it. Why else would she have done this?
I glanced at the heading of the document and saw my name. I wasn’t sure I was up to being a role model for other victimized women, or that I would be able to handle my life on display for public scrutiny. But I knew I needed to be a stronger role model for my children.
I took a deep breath and began to read. They wanted an answer soon. Mr. Frank Graham had enclosed his business card with his cell phone penciled across the back. He wanted me to call him when I had familiarized myself with their offer. The more I read, the wider my eyes became.
My lungs constricted as I stared at the details. It was a huge opportunity. Now I had to decide if it was worth the risk.
***
“So what’re you going to do, sweetie?” my mother asked.
“I don’t know. It could make everything completely different for us financially. But I’m worried about the kids. It’s not a fairy tale kind of story.” I looked out over the beach below me. “Obviously.”
“Well, they won’t be reading it for a few years. By then I imagine a lot of what you’ve written will have made itself known to them.” She paused. “Really think about this.”
“I wish you could read it. I’d like your input before I make a decision.”
“Send it to me.”
“They want an answer soon.”
“Send it. I’ll read it over and give you my two cents’ worth.”
“Some of it might be hard for you to read.” I knew that was an understatement.
“I’m a big girl, Claire. I know what happened. I know it was bad. I’m excited for you about this. And I’m proud of you, too.”
“Kiss the kids for me, please. I’m missing them.” I was, desperately. I stared out the window at the rolling surf in the sunset. I could imagine evenings here, a board game underway, shell collecting on the beach.
“They—we miss you too. I love you, Claire. Trust your instincts and believe in yourself. I’ll talk to you tomorrow?”
“Okay. I love you too, Mom.” I hung up the phone and wandered back inside.
I grabbed the contract from the table and read over it again. I hadn’t read my book since I’d written it. I’d found it when I was cleaning out the files on my old computer. Shannon wanted to read it, so I’d emailed it to her. For me, once the writing ended, the story ended. I’d been content to close it away in the hopes that it would keep all of the bad memories with it.
It hadn’t.
“What are you going to wear?” Shannon asked, sauntering into the dining room. Her phone rang, i
nterrupting our discussion. “Sorry again.” She shot me an apologetic smile. “Hi,” she answered her phone and left the room to take the call.
I stared at the clothes piled on my bed. There was no way I was going to get all these into my suitcase. I dug through one of the shopping bags, looking for something appropriate to wear for dinner.
For the hundredth time, images of attentive hazel eyes and wayward dark blond hair appeared before me. I touched my lips absentmindedly, feeling the memory of his lips on mine. I wished…
Enough was enough. I pulled off my clothes and stepped into a blue silk dress. It was soft, draping over my curves in a very enticing way. I looked really nice. I slipped on my wedge heels, clasped on a lapis lazuli choker, and twisted my hair into a loose knot, clipping it at the base of my neck.
“You look gorgeous.” Shannon was leaning against the doorway.
“So this is appropriate attire? I have no clue.”