“And Dean socked him in the face,” Lucy finished, her face turning thoughtful. “Huh. I’d almost forgotten about that. I’m just not sure what he’s trying to do. Piss off Spencer or get you to date him.”
Tatum shook her head. “He’s just being Dean. He’s teasing.” She thought about his rebound-guy offer and grinned. He wasn’t serious.
“He and Spencer have had this competitive thing forever.” Lucy sighed. “Boys.”
“I’m confused. How is Spencer involved?” Celeste asked.
Somehow, he’s always involved. But she didn’t say anything. Her emotions were too raw at the moment. And she didn’t know what to make of them. Or how to face them.
“Spencer and Tatum were pretty serious in high school,” Lucy explained.
“A lifetime ago,” Tatum murmured, the onslaught of conflicting emotions hurting her head. She let the lightweight material of the blue Grecian dress slide through her fingers, absentmindedly.
“High school romances,” Celeste said. “First love. Oh, the memories.”
“I never dated in high school.” Lucy frowned. “Not high school boys, anyway.”
While the others kept talking about past relationships and high school, she tried on the blue dress. Talking about either meant talking about Spencer. She was doing plenty of that already. Lucy had promised to take Celeste dress shopping for Cady and Patton’s wedding and dragged her along too. And while Tatum wasn’t sold on going to the wedding, she figured spending a day out was better than analyzing what had happened the night before. With Spencer.
“You look gorgeous,” Lucy said with a sigh. “It just hugs in all the right places.”
“Drop-dead gorgeous,” Celeste agreed. “Unlike this.” She spun around in a pea green jersey dress stretched taut over her sizable chest.
They all laughed.
She did feel pretty in the dress. And, whether or not she went to the wedding, it couldn’t hurt to have something new in her closet. Memory-free. Especially when it made her feel like this. “I think I’ll get it.” She tugged her clothes back on. “I’m going to do a little Christmas shopping while you finish up.”
She carried out her dress and wandered along the racks and aisles of holiday items. She hadn’t meant to wander into the lingerie section, but that was where she ended up. And an especially sheer black lace number with a built-in push-up bra and matching lace thong caught her eye. That was undeniably sexy. And since she’d clearly established that they were all about the sex, this would be a perfectly acceptable purchase. She took it, strolling past the jewelry and accessories, her eyes drawn to a large variety of silk scarves on the back wall. Even though the saleslady had no idea what the four silk scarves were for as she packed them next to her sexy lingerie, Tatum couldn’t help but blush. She was buying stuff to tie up her... Spencer.
She took her time, poking through shops along the square. She bought Lucy her favorite perfume, added a baking cookbook for Mrs. Ryan and picked a lovely set of embroidered sheets off Cady and Patton’s bridal registry.
As she was coming out of the shop, she spied a candy shop across the street. If she remembered correctly, Spencer’s favorite candies were jelly beans. The small ones with the superstrong flavor. Some of her favorite memories were of them eating jelly beans in the dark on her roof and tossing all of the buttered popcorn–flavored beans into the dark. She paused, so caught up in the past that she was there. His laugh. Her head pillowed on his shoulder. His kiss on her temple. He’d been smaller then, with fewer muscles, but his love had been as constant as the stars above her. She’d trusted him, them. They’d spent hours there on summer nights, talking, just hanging out together. He’d always held her hand, always. She could almost feel his hand on hers now.
I care.
What did that mean? Did she want to know? What if it meant opening up old wounds? She’d bled enough from the p
ast.
Before there was the bad, there had been so much good. She’d let one week of hell—and a moment of utter humiliation—tarnish something that had helped her through so much. He’d been a pillar in her life, a support, something she’d clung to when her parents fell apart. When her grandparents died. Her mother. How many times had he rescued her, built her back up when her mother had torn her to shreds?
There’d been love and laughter too. With jelly beans and tickle fights, and making out until they both needed to cool down. Maybe reliving that wouldn’t be so bad? But reliving the good always led to the end. One day Spencer had been her world, the next he didn’t love her anymore. She still didn’t know why.
Maybe the why shouldn’t matter anymore?
She made a beeline for the shop, purchasing a large bag of assorted flavors before heading back to the clothing store.
They had mani-pedis before Celeste headed to Tucker House to set up for the bridal shower, and Tatum and Lucy went back to Tatum’s place to change. By unspoken agreement, their conversation steered clear of all things men and focused on career.
Lucy had been working as the police psychiatrist for a couple of years, working under a veteran psychologist she didn’t always see eye to eye with.
“It’s the old-boy network, you know? If he likes a guy, he’s more likely to send them back out—even though there’s no way in hell they should be on the streets.” Lucy sighed, leaning forward to apply eyeliner in the large mirror hanging on the closet door.
“I’m sort of glad my career choice doesn’t involve weaponry,” Tatum teased. But she was serious. She’d lost so many people in her life, the idea of being surrounded by life-and-death situations on a daily basis held no appeal. Another reason not to get attached to Spencer. “Seriously, I respect what you do. I don’t think I could.”
Lucy shook her head. “Ditto. I could never work with my husband. If I had one.” She giggled. “I only met Brent twice, but he seemed like a hard man to please.”
“He was very opinionated. His way was always the right way. The work was no big deal, I know my stuff and I did my job. Honestly, we were better at being coworkers than a married couple. Especially in the bedroom.”