Remembrance

When she spoke again, her voice was lowered and harsh. “You must listen to me. You are a man now and you must behave as a man. You cannot be a boy and tell everything that you know. Part of being an adult is that you have and can keep secrets. If you are man enough to get married, then you are man enough to protect that girl you want to marry. Are you that man?”

“Yes,” he answered.

“Then you must listen to me. You cannot tell anyone what you know. My family loves me very much, just as you love the woman who raised you. What do you think you would feel at her death?”

Talis could not even think of Meg dying.

Alida continued. “When I die my family will come apart. They will not know how to manage without me. So I must look to you to take care of them for a while. I must place the burden of my death on your head and yours alone. You cannot be so cruel as to give this awful knowledge to the girl you love, could you?”

Talis shook his head.

“And you cannot tell her you have asked to marry her.”

“I must tell Callie that,” Talis said. “You do not know her. She will think that…that I…”

“That you don’t love her?” Alida asked, her eyes sparkling. “Do you forget that I was a woman before I was a wife and mother? Oh, she will nag you. She will pout and complain, tell you that she thinks she means nothing to you.” She chuckled. “Does that sound so bad?”

“No,” Talis said, smiling, thinking that it all sounded rather wonderful. Sometimes he thought Callie was too sure of him.

“The truth is, I must persuade my husband to this marriage. You see, Talis, Callasandra’s parentage is not as yours. This man who is her father is not someone who is desirable as a father-in-law. When my husband came to me about your marriage, he was against it. He wants to send Callasandra to her father and—” She broke off at Talis’s gasp.

“You cannot send Callie away! I will go with her.”

“And do what?” she asked sharply. “Become a wood-chopper?”

For a moment Talis drew in his breath as he remembered Callie’s story of a boy and girl who ran away and nearly starved to death.

“You must trust me,” she said. “You must trust me. I want what you want and what is best for you. I will persuade my husband; I will leave you rewarded for all your help. But in the next two years you must help me.”

“Yes, I will do all that I can.”

“I want you to swear to me some things.”

At that Talis’s eyes widened. Knights made sacred vows. Knights swore oaths to ladies who needed them.

“Hand me the Bible there,” she said, raising her arm weakly and pointing to a heavy book bound in ancient ivory. When he had the book in his hands, she said, “You must swear to me that you will tell no one of my approaching death.”

“I swear it.”

“Now kiss the Bible.”

He did so, solemnly and with great reverence.

“Swear that you will not tell Callasandra that you have asked permission to marry her. If she asks, you must tell her that you have not decided who you will marry.”

At that Talis hesitated, but at Alida’s frown, he swore it and kissed the Bible.

“Swear that you will leave her a virgin until you are married.”

Talis’s eyes widened.

“You cannot think to take what does not belong to you, can you? What if she were to get with child and then you fell off your horse and broke your neck before you could marry her? What would happen to her and your child? Have you no concern for her? Or are you interested only in your own baser needs? Or have I misjudged you and you are just a boy and not the man I thought you were?”

Talis still hesitated, but after a while he kissed the Bible again and made his third vow.

When he had finished, Alida looked at him, so earnest, obviously taking what he did with utmost seriousness. “You must stay away from her,” she said softly. “Already people talk of her. They say she is not of good character, that the two of you have known each other many times.”

“That is not true!” he said.