“Look, Zoë,” Karen said, her tone changing. “It’s just that I need to see him. I got a weird phone call from him today, and—”
“What did he say?”
“Nothing that would concern you, but if you must know, I think he’s having doubts about us.” She waved her hand in dismissal. “It’s nothing. I told him I might tell his wife, but of course I wouldn’t. Anybody who knows me knows I wouldn’t do something like that. No, Alan is going to have to stand up in front of the entire town and tell them that he loves me and only me.”
“What about the children?” Zoë asked.
“Don’t you dare get that holier-than-thou look on your face. You have never been trapped like I am. Do you know that I could have gone to college? I could have had a full scholarship, but I turned it down to marry Bob. I thought he was going places, doing things. What a fool I was.”
Zoë didn’t dare look up. Her sister had barely kept a C average at school. Who was going to give her a scholarship? For what? And Zoë too well remembered that Bob had tried to break up with her before they graduated. He had been offered a four-year football scholarship at the state university, but when Karen became pregnant and insisted on keeping the baby, he’d given it up to marry her.
Karen glared at her sister. “I’ve done everything for you and Bob and the kids. Now it’s time for you to do something for me. You’re going to go with me tonight and that’s it. I don’t want to hear anything else about it. Now go get dressed. We’ll leave as soon as Bob gets home.”
Which means that he has to make dinner for the kids, Zoë thought.
An hour and a half later, she was in the car with Karen. Her sister was wearing a short, red cocktail dress with a fake diamond necklace.
“Should you be wearing that?” Zoë asked, looking at her sister as she inhaled deeply on her cigarette. Once again, she’d forgotten to put the window down.
“I want to look my best,” Karen said. “Someday when you have a real boyfriend, not that geek you pal around with now, you’ll understand a woman’s need to sometimes wear something other than jeans.” She gave a little smile at Zoë’s Levi’s.
When they got to Mr. Johnson’s house, Karen turned off the headlights at the top of the drive. “This is just one of the little things we’ve had to do,” she said, smiling at Zoë as though they were in a conspiracy together. She maneuvered the car by the landscaping lights along the drive, hiding it way in the back, behind the garbage bins.
There was only one light on in the house. “That’s his study,” Karen said. “It’s where we meet when we need to be alone.” She gave Zoë a look to let her know what she meant by that.
“I’m not going in,” Zoë said.
“Of course you aren’t,” Karen said. “I just needed you to come with me so Bob would have to stay with the kids. I didn’t want him free tonight.”
Karen pulled the sun visor down and reapplied her lipstick in the little lighted mirror. “Just wait here. I shouldn’t be too long. Well, maybe I’ll be a long time.”
Zoë knew that if she said anything to that, Karen would blast her, and she didn’t want to hear it. She watched her sister walk into Mr. Johnson’s house, her hips swaying, her high heels tapping on the pavement.
I have to leave this town, Zoë thought as she sat in the car and waited for her sister. Karen had said Zoë owed her for all the years she’d taken care of her “for free,” but Zoë was now old enough to see that she’d more than carried her weight. It occurred to Zoë that if it weren’t for her taking care of the children, Karen wouldn’t have had time to have an affair.
When the car door was jerked open, Zoë almost fell out. Karen had a frantic look about her and her eye makeup was running down her cheeks.
“You have to talk to him,” Karen said. “He’s crazy.”
“Me? What can I say to him?”
“I don’t know,” Karen said, “but he won’t listen to me. He keeps talking about money, but what does that have to do with me? He’s bought me a few measly presents, but not much. Zoë, he’s always liked you, so maybe he’ll listen to you.”
“I can’t—” Zoë said, but Karen grabbed her arm and pulled her out of the car. “I’m not going in there! I can’t.” For once Zoë felt strong. It seemed that all her life she’d been intimidated by her older sister. Karen was the pretty one, the social one, the one who was going to make it in the world. Her parents had never said it, but they thought Zo
ë was “the weird one.” The girl who stayed to herself and rarely talked to anyone. The loner.
“I’m not going in there,” Zoë said again. “This is your problem, you made it, and I’m not getting involved in it.”
“It’s not me,” Karen said, and put her hands over her face. “It’s something else. I don’t know what it is, but he’s…” She looked at her sister with pleading eyes. “I think he’s going to kill himself.”
“Call the police,” Zoë said, and reached inside the car for her cell phone.
“No!” Karen said. “Listen, Zoë, I’ll do whatever you want if you’ll help me on this. I can’t let the town know about this. I can’t let Bob find out. Or the kids. Did you think about them?”
“You’re not going to turn this around on me!” Zoë said. “You—”
“Please?” Karen begged. “Please. Just go talk to him.”