As soon as she was gone, Kate started to remove her feet from Jack’s lap, but he held on to them. She really didn’t want to move and she relaxed.
“Something’s bothering you,” he said.
“Besides murder?”
“Yeah, besides that. I saw you on the phone and you weren’t happy.”
“I don’t see how you saw anything since you were beating on that bag so hard. Do you really think Gil had something to do with Mrs. Beeson’s murder? You think he’s the person Sheriff Flynn is about to arrest?”
“I don’t know and don’t change the subject. You were on the phone for at least thirty minutes. What’s the problem?”
When Kate didn’t answer right away, he tossed the lap robe back and began to massage her bare feet.
Kate closed her eyes. “I may turn into a bowl of warm Jell-O.” When she looked at him, he was smiling in a way that was an invitation to a lot more than a foot rub. She pulled her feet out of his lap and sat up.
“Who were you talking to on the phone?”
“My lover.”
He gave a snort.
“Okay,” she said. “My mother.”
“Was she in one of her depression bouts?”
Kate drew her legs to her chest and put her arms around them. “No. She was happier than I’ve ever heard her.” She looked at Jack. “Remember I told you that she used to fly to New York to buy fabric to make clothes for me?”
“Yes.”
“Every time she returned, she’d have a serious attack. I’d come home from school and she’d be curled up on the floor. It was really hard to coax her into bed or even into the bathroom.”
“You did this when you were in elementary school?” He sounded shocked.
Kate nodded. “And high school and when I came home on weekends from college. I thought her trips were the cause. I thought...”
“What?”
“That being away from me was the cause of her misery. I thought she missed me so much that...” Tears were coming.
Jack reached out his arm to put around her and drew her head to his shoulder. “What happened today?”
“She’s in New York and she’s been there for a week and she’s happy.”
“Isn’t that good?”
She pushed away from him. “Don’t you see? Maybe all her depression bouts were because she had to come back to me. Maybe I was the cause of them. Now that she’s free, she’s happy.” She put her hands over her face, fighting back tears.
Jack pulled her hands away and made her look at him. “You are not the cause of your mother’s depression. You didn’t make it happen and you aren’t taking it away. None of this is about you.”
Kate sniffed. “But it was just us. One of us had to—”
“Really?” Jack’s voice was firm. “You’re saying that you are responsible for every feeling she has? Pretty powerful, aren’t you?”
“I’m not. I just...” She sniffed again. “Maybe I’m hurt because she’s so happy without me.”
“And how are you doing without her? Living in misery?”
“I’m the happiest I’ve ever been in my life,” she said softly.