Loving Jacob (Breathless 5)

“Whatever is going on in Utah must be terribly important for him to still be there.”

“The Utah office is in crisis. He had to fire the director because he was accused of sexual misconduct and Turner is being sued.”

“I knew it had to be something on that scale. That man is determined to get you back. And I can’t say I blame him. You come from a good stock of people,” Tasha gloated.

“Yeah, well, I don’t see that happening.” I sighed. “We’re more than likely finished.”

“You love him, Destiny. I can hear it in your voice whenever we talk about him. What he did makes me mad as hell whenever I think about it, but I also know he loves you. I could see that in his eyes when I pulled out of his driveway with you and the kids in the car.”

“Well, love doesn’t keep everything together. Honesty and loyalty are just as important. And, before you go in on me, I know I did my dirt, but I had not accepted his marriage proposal and I wasn’t planning for a wedding while screwing Montie. I think that’s a big difference, along with the fact that I came clean with him. I put all my cards on the table and let him have the choice of whether he wanted to play the hand,” I argued.

“And he chose you.”

“I guess he chose us both since he was still with her and we’re both pregnant at the same time.”

“Awe, Desi. I’m torn. You know I was against him in the beginning because I thought he was just a rich, white prick that wanted to take advantage of you. However, I came to like him and think his love for you is genuine. Jacob has really got me messed up with this.”

“If you’re messed up, then you know I’m destroyed. So, I guess the question is am I going to sit on the phone and mope about him all night or do we have something uplifting to talk about?” I asked and giggled nervously.

“Do you need me to come to Atlanta and keep you company and help you organize your house? You shouldn’t be lifting or moving heavy furniture. Wait, please tell me you’re not doing trying to move that furniture around on your own, Ms. Superwoman.”

“Oh no, Montie has been helping me a lot.”

“Montie?” she asked. I could imagine the questions running through her mind.

“Montie and his girlfriend, Lissa, were nice enough to offer me a hand. Montie got one of his frat brothers to move the big furniture with him, while Lissa helped me clean and reorganize the kid’s room. This house was a dusty mess, but it’s looking good now.”

“Hold on,” Tasha said and the line went silent. “I’m back. I had to go pinch myself. Did you just say Montie and his girlfriend helped you move?”

“Yeah, and the kids are gone with them now to give me time to relax, but I’m up working instead.”

“You’ve got to be shitting me. Montie…and his girlfriend…at your house?”

“You’re a mess, Tasha. I’m not entertaining you either.”

“I’m just saying. How did that work out with the three of you being there at once? The last time I saw Montie it was written all over his face that he was still in love with you.”

“Well, I like Lissa, so everything was cool with her being here. Montie has fallen head over tail in love with her, and that’s the only thing that shows on his face when she is around,” I said.

“He must really like her to bring her around you. Not too long ago, his nostrils were wide open sniffing for your scent,” she said in a high-pitched tone. “Now, he’s bringing his new girl around. I don’t know whether to be happy for him or be ticked.”

“Tasha, be happy for the man. I am. But I

can’t lie, at first, I was a little bruised when I saw them together, and how much she looked like me, and how he couldn’t keep his hands off her. What could I say, though? I remarried and asked him to be a part of making my marriage work by letting the kids move to Miami. He was willing to try for me, so I’m doing the same for him. Besides, it’s hard for me to feel anything about Montie being with Lissa but happiness for them both. She told me about the men who hurt her in the past and how she’s blessed to have Montie. At least they are in love, and I’m happy for them.”

“I get it, you’re happy for them. What about you and Jacob though? Maybe your love story doesn’t have to end where it is. If it does, Justine gets what she wanted all along.”

“Tasha, give me a break with the Jacob hypothesizing. What’s done is done cannot be undone, no matter what Justine tried to do, or how bad I want him.”

“Listen, let me just tell you that I thought his story about Justine sneaking sex from him sounded like fuckery off the top, but the more I remember the night Miami went black I think it’s damn sure possible.”

“Oh, so it appears that you’ve drank of the Jacob Kool-Aid. You think she snuck into our house, went up into our room, slipped into my pajamas, sprayed on some of my perfume, went into his study where he was sleeping, and screwed him until she was pregnant with his seed, all without him knowing until the deed was done? At no point from the time he entered her body to the time he impregnated her did he realize it was her, and not me,” I repeated the ignoramus story bitingly.

“It’s possible,” Tasha said in a low tone as if she was attempting to make herself believe the bogusness. “I mean wait, I’m not taking up for him, but I’m a hard sleeper. A burglar could sneak off with me in his arms and I wouldn’t realize I wasn’t in my bed unless my alarm went off in my pajama pocket, and I still might not wake up then.”

“Don’t overanalyze for him, Tasha. This happened weeks before we got married. If he she tricked him, and he knew she tricked him, he had ample time to tell me about it. That way, I could have dusted her off for sneaking in my house and messing with my man. But did he do that? No. He just kept the secret and our whimsical insta-love fantasy lived on like nothing happened.” I repeated the excruciating memories that prohibited me from giving my heart back to Jacob completely. Those reminders replayed in my mind everyday like a sad, old-school music video where the girl with a big heart falls deep in love and gets played.

“Jacob should have told you what happened. I’m not trying to defend that point, but I can’t help but feel he got duped. He’s not that stupid to sleep with Justine. He’s always shown her contempt and you love. It just doesn’t add up.”