“Yes, you do, and there’s nothing wrong with that. It’s okay to forgive your man. It doesn’t matter if you sleep with your husband. If he makes your voice glow the way it’s glowing this morning, you should give him a second chance. No matter what he has done. You took a vow before God to be by his side no matter what, and no one has a right to judge you if you decide to stay with him,” Tasha said.
“I’m not worrying about anyone else’s judgements. It’s my own judgement that I’m concerned with,” I admitted.
“So what? You won’t be the first woman in the world to have a baby the same age as their husband’s other baby. It happened before you married him, and I know it’s a jacked-up situation. I’m not trying to sugar coat it. I’m just saying that if you want to take him back you should do so without even judging yourself. You deserve to be happy and, if Jacob is the man for the job, then that’s just what it is.”
“Thanks for the pep talk, Tasha. I will figure this out. But for now, he’s here. I’m not pushing him away. However, nothing is set in stone. I could decide today that I don’t want to look at him again. I’ve been doing that a lot, and it could his affair, or it could be my pregnancy hormones at play.”
“Yeah, you do get a little nutty when you’re pregnant,” Tasha said and laughed.
“You’re funny. Ha, ha,” I said faking a laugh.
“I just want it to be documented that I told you what I think you should do.”
“And I appreciate you sis. We’ll have to get together when I go to Miami for a shopping day with Mama next week. She swears she needs me to come to town so we can dress shop for a ball that John is taking her to.”
“Honey, are you up for that?” Tasha laughed.
“Girl, I hope I don’t forget to wear my walking shoes.” Mama tended to bring meaning to the phrase shop ‘til you drop.’
“Just let me know when you guys get ready to go. I’d love to come and hang out with you two.”
“Okay, I will call you then.”
We said our goodbyes. Since I was up, I went into the kitchen to prepare breakfast. I took out a carton of eggs, fruits, sausage, and wheat toast to grill. I began scrambling the egg whites and thinking the first argument I ever had with Jacob.
"I saw you," I spat.
“What do you mean?”
"I. Saw. You," I said through clenched teeth.
"Okay, you saw me, but where? And, what about you seeing me is pissing you off," he asked the questions, but his paling complexion showed me that he knew what I was talking about.
"Last night.
“At the lounge?”
“Yes! Who was the girl that was sucking your face?"
Anxiety ran across his face. Hurt entered his eyes. "Her name is Justine," he said as if that was supposed to mean something to me.
"Go on!" I said.
"She’s my girlfriend. I mean ex-girlfriend," he continued. “We’re just friends, Destiny.”
I struggled to process his revelation. Part of me reeled from the news. I half expected him to say she was some girl he met up with and it meant nothing. Or, maybe he got drunk and found himself caught up kissing some random woman. But no. She was his woman.
"Girlfriend?" I growled out, as my right hand itched to slap the taste out of his gorgeous mouth.
He nodded. "She’s my ex, and we used to live together."
My jaw dropped open.
“She’s not just a girlfriend. You lived with her, too. You have got to be kidding me," I hollered as I looked down at the flowers clutched in my hand. I threw them at him and jumped to my feet. "You are a cheater, and that’s lower than the lowest piece of shit."
I didn’t want to keep reliving the past and getting enraged about Jacob’s actions anymore. Those kinds of thoughts only kept me enraged. I didn’t want that anymore.
When his arms wrapped around me from behind, I turned off the stove and scraped the eggs and turkey sausage onto a plate. I put the pan back down on the stove and spun around to face him.