Feel the Fire (Hotshots 3)

“Right,” Luis echoed weakly. He was supposed to want to go home, to his tiny apartment with his few scraggly houseplants that had inevitably died in his absence, and not supposed to care about leaving Tucker’s open kitchen and backyard oasis and Tucker.

Tucker, who had looked stricken for the instant their eyes met, was looking down at his notepad now, expression shuttered. He’d been hoping for more time, that much was clear, and Luis’s neck tensed with the realization that so had he. He wasn’t ready for talk of his work here winding down.

“They’ll probably still need me if they go to trial, so I might not be completely out of your hair either way,” he joked to Adams, carefully not glancing again at Tucker, even as the tension spread from his neck to his upper back.

“Or you could save me a job hunt, put in for the position if the hiring freeze lifts.” Adams laughed jovially. “But I know you Californian guys. No way are you trading your winters for ours.”

“Or the beaches and things to do,” Christine added, typing away on her laptop. “We’re taking the kids to Disney at Christmas break. I’m already looking forward to it, and the rainy season hasn’t even hit yet, let alone the snow.”

“Have a great trip,” Luis said, grateful for the chance to ignore the remark about putting in for a job here, which Adams had clearly meant mostly in jest, a way to say he appreciated the job Luis was doing. He didn’t really expect him to stay. Tucker on the other hand...

Well, that might be a whole different story, especially judging by how the thundercloud over Tucker’s head only darkened, unhappiness radiating off him when they passed in the hall a few minutes later as the meeting broke up.

“Hey,” Luis said in a low voice. “You got a minute? Have you eaten lunch yet?”

“I’ve got a hand crew to check in on. Was planning on grabbing something on the way there.” Tucker’s frown didn’t waver.

“Oh.” Hell, Luis didn’t know what to say, especially not in the hall like this where anyone could walk by. “We should talk later—”

“Thought we weren’t doing that,” Tucker said in a near-whisper. “Not gonna think about next week or what comes after that. Live in the moment.”

“Yeah, but—”

“It is what it is.” Tucker rolled his shoulders, still not meeting Luis’s eyes. “I better get on with my day. Should be in the field most of the afternoon.”

“Ah. We still on for tomorrow?”

Tucker’s gaze darted down the empty hall. “And tonight. Your cat is currently busy terrorizing dust bunnies at my place. She’ll want to see you.”

“And you?” Head tilting, Luis studied him, trying to decipher all the things Tucker wasn’t saying.

“Figured that much was a given.” Tucker gave him half a smile that didn’t reach his eyes.

“Maybe not. You seem in a mood.”

Tucker blew out a breath, then softened his tone. “Not enough of one to not want you around.”

“Not exactly a denial.” For whatever reason, Luis didn’t want to let this go, didn’t want tension simmering between them, hurts and resentments building up, not when they’d done such a good job of moving past the old ones.

“What do you want me to say? Like I said, it is what it is. Us talking about it will only make things worse.”

“You’re probably right.” This was hardly the place to unpack complicated feelings, and even if they were in a more private locale, Tucker had a point. Talking might simply make the pain more stark, underscore realities they couldn’t change. He might not want tension between them, but he wanted an argument even less. If they were down to days, he didn’t want to waste them.

“I know I am. Listen, I’ll text on my way back from the field. You can help me figure out dinner.”

Luis’s chest hurt as he laughed at that. So domestic. If only everything could be so easy. “That I can do.”

But there was so much he couldn’t do. So much he couldn’t control. The future was rushing up to meet both of them, and there wasn’t a damn thing he could do about it.

* * *

“You seem to have acquired a cat.” Heidi arched an elegant eyebrow at the cat, who was currently on her favorite bookshelf, the one that caught some of the morning light. Every so often the cat’s whiskers twitched, and she glanced toward the stairs, undoubtedly waiting for Walker. Or possibly looking for an opportunity to do Tucker in. With Blaze, he could never be too sure.

“I’m borrowing her,” Tucker said lightly, not looking for a deep conversation with Heidi, especially not this early in the morning. The boys were due to leave soon for the SAT, and Heidi had arrived with breakfast muffins from Isaac.

“And the cat’s owner?” Heidi broke off a piece of muffin, apparently in no great hurry to leave.