Off Base (Out of Uniform 1)

“Yeah, I’ll probably sleep.” Zack knew he didn’t have to work to look exhausted. “But in case I don’t, did they give you guys my cell?”

“Your phone?” His mother shook her head. “They didn’t give us anything of yours. Do you need me to call someone for you?”

Yes. “Nah. That’s okay. Go on. Get food.” He waved them out of the room. Wasn’t like he had Pike’s number memorized, unfortunately.

Keep telling yourself that’s why you didn’t ask for her phone. His neck ached if he moved too fast and his head swam, but he did a quick view of the room. No phone that he could see. There was a call button for the nurse, but was “I need to contact my boyfriend” really something he should bug them with?

His finger hovered over the button. He was just about to press the button when someone came around the curtain.

“I need—” His mouth opened and shut with no words coming out, because there, as if he’d conjured him with his sheer force of want, was Pike. A very rumpled, stressed-looking Pike. He was in professor clothes—white shirt, wrinkled khakis, tie askew. You. I need you.

“You’re here,” he said stupidly.

“Yeah.” Pike blinked a lot, then scrubbed at his face. “Is that okay?”

“More than.” Zack’s face felt weirdly stretched. Huh. Probably his first smile in days. “My parents just left to get food.”

“I know.” Pike lowered himself into the chair Zack’s dad had just vacated. He scooted the chair closer. “I’ve been here hours.”

“Hours? But why didn’t you come...” In. Zack trailed off, brain catching up to his words. Of course Pike hadn’t come in. My parents. The same parents who didn’t know a thing about Pike or even that Zack was living off base.

“Because.” Pike cast a glance over his shoulder at the curtain, then gently took Zack’s hand. “This. I can’t not touch you right now. I need to know it’s you, that you’re here, that you’re going to be okay—”

“I am.” Zack scooted over against the far side of the bed the best he could. “Come here.”

“Don’t want to hurt you.” Pike gingerly moved to the edge of the bed, still too far away. Mindful of his wires and IVs, Zack tugged him closer.

“You won’t.” Simply feeling Pike’s warmth kicked Zack’s heart rate up, made him smile wider. This. He’d been needing this.

“God, you scared me so badly.” Pike pressed a kiss to the side of Zack’s face.

“Man, I must be rank.” It hurt to laugh. “How did you find out?”

“Ryan called. Someone called him.” Pike’s voice was steamroller flat, all his usual animation gone.

“Oh thank goodness then. Glad he reached you.”

“Zack—” Pike sighed and shook his head.

“What?”

“Never mind.” Pike’s eyes were sadder than Zack had ever seen them, deep liquid pools of emerald. “Not right now. Not when you’re still so weak and I’m so freaking happy you’re not dead.”

“Not what right now?” Zack shoved futilely at Pike’s shoulder. All it did was jostle his IV. “Ow. Shit.”

“Don’t hurt yourself. You’ve been sick days, Zack. Days and days.” Pike swiped at his face. “Hell, I can’t do this. Should have stayed in the waiting area.”

“Hey now. I’m okay now. It’s all good.”

Pike’s answering smile broke Zack’s heart. “Yeah, you are.”

“What’s wrong?”

“Listen, I should probably get going. Ryan’s coming tomorrow. Do you want me to come back with him? Or...”

I want you here always. But he couldn’t say that because it wasn’t happening. “My parents...they’ll still be here, I’m sure.”

“Yeah, I figured.” Pike’s eyes were resigned, tired lines replacing his usual crinkles from smiling so much. “So I guess I’ll let you let Ryan know when you’re getting released, and he can tell me. If you want me to know.”

“Of course I do.” Zack thought he was already hurting as much as a body could, but every beat of his heart made ribs ache. Something awful was happening and he couldn’t stop it. “Why won’t you tell me what’s wrong?”

Pike pinched the bridge of his nose. “If someone hadn’t called Ryan, I wouldn’t know you were here. And you work a dangerous job. This might have been some freak thing, but this isn’t the last time there will be a call about you.”

“I’m trying to follow you.” Zack’s brain had been wrapped in wet wool.

“When did your parents find out you were sick? When you were at the other hospital, right? No question that someone was going to call them.”

“You want a call?” Zack squinted, still trying to process why Pike was so upset. “It’s because they’re listed on my forms—”

“Exactly.” Pike’s voice cracked. “Zack, is that ever going to be me? Is there a future where I’m listed on that form too? Where the people important to you know about me? About us?”

Zack chewed his lip. He wanted to say yes, like he’d wanted to when he’d gotten sick after diving and Morrison had asked him if there was anyone he could call. He wanted that person to be Pike. But then there was all that shit with Cobb and Harper and his parents here praying over him and saying how worried they’d been and everything was all jumbled up in his head.