“That was a mistake,” he says, and he’s panting like he’s out of breath.
“Mistake.” I repeat the word that slices right through me. I’m pretty sure I was also a mistake to my parents, not that they were around to ever say it to me. I’m not stupid, and they weren't cut out for the whole parenting thing, but hearing it from someone that I considered a good man is harsh.
“I’m sorry.” He closes his eyes, shaking his head.
He’s sorry? Great, I'm a mistake and a regret.
“Don’t worry about it.” I try to keep my words calm as I slip off the counter. “This dirty secret will stay between us. I wouldn’t want the town to think you’re not the all-American hero.”
I know I look different than most girls around town. I change the color of my hair all the time, and my style can be a bit out there compared to everyone here. I stand out in town, which isn’t a bad thing, but it’s a reminder that at the end of the day I’m still an outsider. I’ll never really belong anywhere no matter how hard I try, and I certainly won’t fit into the box Cooper Cross wants to shove me into.
“Fuck.” He shakes his head. “Juno, I was…”
“Don’t.” I hold my hand up, not wanting to hear it.
It already hurts this much after only getting a taste of what I’d dreamed about. As quickly as it was mine, it was gone, and I’m not waiting around to hear the rest of his regrets. I’m only glad that I’ve found my voice again and can mask my pain. I’ve always been good at that, but it’s probably the years of practice.
“You stay away from me and I’ll stay away from you,” I say before turning to leave him behind.
He doesn't stop me from going, which gives me all the answers I need.
Cooper Cross will never be mine.
Chapter One
Cooper
Many months later…
“Hey, Sheriff, how’s it going?”
I nod at Jim, the guy that owns the music shop downtown, and straighten my paper. “Good, just taking my lunch break.” I scan back over the sports section, reading again about the Lions’ win over East this past Friday night.
There’s not much in the local paper, but I’m distracted and have to re-read a few times.
“Out here?” Jim asks, and I look up again from the paper.
I’m outside the music shop on Main Street sitting on a bench with my lunch half eaten next to me. It’s a beautiful day, so why wouldn’t I take advantage of the sunshine and summer weather just around the corner?
“Yeah, why?”
“Nothing really, just wondering if it’s because this spot is perfect for looking into the diner.” I glare at Jim, and the old man smiles as he tips his hat and goes into his shop.
“Bunch of busybodies in this town,” I mumble, fluffing out my newspaper again and trying to read the sports section for a fourth—no, fifth time.
I try like hell to read the article about the local high school's chance at going to state this year, but instead I find my paper slowly lowering so I can look over the top at the town’s only restaurant. The special today is fried chicken, and it’s the best in the whole state. My stomach grumbles at the thought of it, but then I catch a glimpse of lavender and I remember why I don’t go in there anymore.
Grabbing the peanut butter and jelly sandwich next to me, I take a bite and try not to think about all the shitty sandwiches I’ve been eating lately. Last week I drove to the city to see Lux just so I could have a home-cooked meal. But then she asked me too many questions about…her, and then I had an emergency at work and needed to leave early.
The hairs on the back of my neck stand up, and when I glance up from my paper, I see she’s watching me. Well, she’s actually glaring at me, but it stirs me all the same.
Juno Folke has been a thorn in my paw since the day she met Lux. She’s always there, digging in, and I can’t get her out of me. I even tried one night to give in and—
That’s enough.
I scold my own thoughts because I can’t go down that path. I can’t think of that night in the kitchen, especially out here in the daylight. That’s a memory for when I’m alone and it’s dark. Not out here in front of women and children when I can’t do anything to hide what happens when I think about those soft lips…
“Damn it,” I curse myself as I shake my paper out once more. The damn thing is going to be shredded by the time my lunch break is over.
“They say talking to yourself is a sign of insanity.” I look up and see Luca leaning against the light pole with a toothpick in his hand. He’s smug as he smiles down at my lunch and shakes his head. “You know people drive from the next state over for that fried chicken, but here you sit with your PB&J with the most sour-looking face I’ve ever seen.”