Untouchable (Untouchables, 1)

“You wanted one or two to play in the leaf piles anyway. Jeeze, does nothing make you happy? It is like we’re married.”

“Next time you fuck me without a condom, I’m buyin’ myself a ‘baby on board’ maternity shirt, and it’s all I’m ever going to wear around you.”

“You are a real pain in my ass, you know that?” he asks, opening a drawer and grabbing some silverware.

I grab some while he has it open. “Wait until my pregnancy hormones kick in.”

“For fuck’s sake, you are not pregnant.”

“No thanks to you,” I mutter.

Carter shakes his head, puts his plate down, and moves close. I move my plate aside just in time for him to close in. His chest brushes mine and he grabs the back of my neck, pulling me in for a kiss. “No discussing our impending family at the breakfast table,” he tells me when he pulls back. “I’m sure you can guess, but my parents would be decidedly less amused.”

“You know when you’re going to be decidedly less amused? When I’m sendin’ you to the store at 3am because I’m craving a certain brand of pickles.”

Carter takes a step back, rolls his eyes at me again, and grabs his plate. “Come on, wifey.”

“And my back is already aching from carrying around your spawn. I hope you’re plannin’ to give me a back rub later.”

“Are your feet swelling up, too? Maybe I should just buy you a whole spa day.”

“I mean, it’s the least you could do for the mother of your child.”

Carter walks ahead of me, shaking his head, but I let the joke die since we’re walking back into the dining room. I should tell on him to his parents; maybe they could convince him that safe sex is the only sex we should be having, because I don’t seem to be getting through.

Obviously I’m not going to do that, though.

Carter’s father glances up from his paper to look me over, and I immediately see where both kids got all their looks from. Carter and Chloe both favor their father and got little to no physical characteristics from their mom.

“Mom, Dad, this is Zoey,” Carter offers as he drops into his seat next to Chloe.

I flash his mom a smile, then his father. “Zoey Ellis. It’s nice to meet you both.”

“I’m Angela,” his mother tells me. “This is Carter’s father, Kevin.”

Carter’s father doesn’t greet me, but when I look at him, his gaze is either resting on my breasts, or my Longhorns tank. I hope it’s the latter, and breathe a sigh of relief that it is when a moment later he says, “Zoey Ellis, huh? Bet Jake’s not happy about that.”

I take a seat, looking awkwardly to Carter.

Carter shrugs. “Didn’t ask him. Don’t care.”

“You should care,” his father states. “Jake’s suspension could’ve thrown off your whole season.”

“Could’ve—if the team depended on his talent. Since it relies on mine, we’re just fine,” Carter replies.

His gaze slides past Carter and comes back to me. “Well, in any case, it’s good you got that whole misunderstanding cleared up.”

My fingers tighten around the fork like it’s the blade of a knife that I’m about to plant in Carter’s father’s jugular. “There was no misunderstanding. Jake behaved in a less than gentlemanly manner, and I didn’t appreciate it. Anyway, I’m also glad it’s behind us.”

“Maybe an overreaction to ruin the boy’s last season of football,” Kevin tells me.

“I don’t think it was,” I offer back, with a painfully polite smile. “Personally, I think his behavior warranted a time-out. Since that’s the only punishment that seemed to impact him, I’m glad Coach took it seriously and took away something Jake enjoyed.”

“Did he get grounded?” Chloe asks.

I nod my head. “He sure did.”

“I bet he didn’t like that. I wouldn’t like to be grounded,” she informs me.

“No, I wouldn’t either,” I agree, turning my attention to her, since her company is far more pleasant. Carter’s dad already has my cheeks flushing with defensive annoyance, and that is not the foot I intended to start out on. Carter could have given me a heads up that his dad was on the anti-Zoey, pitchfork-wielding side. Not only would I not have come to this breakfast, I would have avoided meeting his parents at all, at least until the season ended.

I am starting to understand now why he didn’t introduce them to me at the game last night, though. His father condescending to me at the table in private is one thing, but in front of everyone at the stadium? That would have been doubly embarrassing.

“Zoey’s a good girl,” Carter tells Chloe, or his dad, I’m not sure. He’s talking to Chloe, but it sounds more like it’s aimed at his dad. “I’m sure she’s never done anything to get herself grounded.”

“She can’t be that good, if she’s having sleepovers with you,” his dad murmurs, lifting his coffee to his lips and turning his attention back to his paper.