Could fate really be so pitiless as to allow him to build up his hopes for a child—only for those hopes to be cruelly crushed all over again?
And what of the effect losing the baby would have on Katherine herself? Luca was certain her attempts to convince him everything was all right hid a genuine fear that it might not be. His instincts were naturally to offer her some comfort, but this thing that sometimes overtook them both knew no bounds—and surely after the scare she had had they had to be careful? That was why he had not followed through on his impulse to take her into his arms when she came back from the hospital. He was genuinely fearful that his desire for her might again consume and overwhelm him.
Sighing inwardly, Luca shook his head. Sometimes he sensed such strength in this fascinating woman. She could give as good as she got, certainly. But at other times there was a fragility there that made him see that Katherine was vulnerable too. And finding out that she was pregnant by a man she’d shared only one passionate night with in a foreign country—a man she knew nothing about—must have made her feel intensely vulnerable and scared, given her history. Even more so after the situation she had described with her faithless ex-fiancé.
Where before Luca had had to wrestle with feelings of anger and jealousy at the thought of her being with another man after she’d left him that morning in Milan, now new sensations were definitely taking over where she was concerned. And if he chose not to scrutinise those sensations too closely, then he told himself he had the right—given his own tumultous past. Undoubtedly there was still a great need in him to protect himself. But what was becoming only too clear to him also was that Katherine was now his responsibility, and he had a duty to look after her. The coming baby sealed that incontrovertible fact! So…not only would he be insisting that she move in with him permanently while they were away, but just as soon as Luca could arrange it she would become the next Mrs De Rossi. Whether that suited her plans or not!
CHAPTER EIGHT
LUCA had left Kate alone in the sumptuous bedroom where he had first made love to her all those months ago to unpack. The memories of that night submerged her, and filled her with feelings that she barely knew what to do with. Erotic, but also tender, loving feelings. They had conceived their baby in this amazing Emperor-sized bed with its luxurious satin counterpane and silk cushions…
Catching her breath as she smoothed her hand over the lush materials, Kate breathed out deeply. One thing was for sure. She was relieved to find out that they would be sharing a bed!
It had definitely disturbed her that since her scare that morning Luca had seemed to somehow distance himself from her a little bit. Almost as if he was wary of touching her. Yet at the same time his gaze followed her, as though he was fearful she might suddenly have taken ill and…worse…lose the baby. If only he would talk to her about his fears! Then she might be able to allay them. But talking might lead to his becoming closer to Kate emotionally, and she guessed instinctively that Luca was definitely still keeping his guard up where emotions were concerned.
What had happened to make him so guarded? Had there been a woman in his past who had left him or treated him badly, perhaps? If they shared a bed together, maybe intimacy would give Kate the chance to try and get past some of those high walls Luca seemed to surround himself with. She smiled wryly at herself. Frankly it amazed her that she was thinking on such lines. She had, after all, vowed she would never trust another man again after what had happened in the not too distant past. But knowing that she was going to have Luca’s baby and being with him again was slowly changing all that.
Firmly returning her focus to the present, Kate mused how strange it was to be back in this magnificent house…particularly in this room. The setting was familiar, yet it was almost like a scene from a dream. Her heart skipped a beat and a fierce longing for Luca arrowed straight to her womb. With a soft gasp she laid her hand on the gently rounded swell of her stomach, as if to reassure both herself and the baby that everything would be all right. Somehow they would find a way.
If she was brave enough to reach out to Luca and stop feeling so insecure perhaps he would also take a risk and open his heart to her as she yearned for him to do? He must need love as much as she did, she was sure. If something in his past had hurt him and left him emotionally scarred then Kate wanted to know about it. Once or twice she’d seen the shadows of an encounter so painful and disturbing in his sky-blue gaze that she’d wanted to hold on to him and never let him go. In those moments she would have traded every bit of insecurity and fear of rejection to comfort him.