Court Kept (Court High 3)

Chuckling, Ramses shifted and lounged against the rink’s barricade. “Not an ice rink, ’Zona. Ice-skating? Ever heard of it?”

I shoved him a little. “Of course I have, but we can’t skate. Clearly, the rec center is about to close.”

“Not for us. We have the place for the next hour. I took lessons here as a kid. The guy who runs the Zamboni I’m cool with.”

As if he knew, a guy came in across the ice, waving at Ramses and asking if he needed anything. Ramses denied the help, waving his friend off, and when Ramses turned around, he clasped his hands together. He nudged me with his shoulder. “What do you say? I seriously need to make up for what happened tonight. Please. Please. Please.”

He begged me once again, but before he could get on his knees this time, I got a hold of his arm.

“I don’t know how to skate,” I confessed, all of this completely a bad idea, and not only did that not phase Ramses, he put out his hand. He put it out for mine, waiting.

“You won’t have to,” he said, gripping my hand when I allowed him to take it. He smiled. “You have me.”

I did have him, had him this whole time, and I hadn’t forgotten that. Ramses had been there in moments when no one else had, even out in Arizona when I’d been more than sketchy and given him every reason not to trust me. Even still, he’d been by my side, and when we finally got out on the ice, the same.

“Now, take small steps, ’Zona. Small steps,” he coached, already out there himself. He looked like an Olympian skater with his easy glide on the ice. He even took it one further and did a few turns before skating back to me.

I currently gripped the wall like a lifeline, shaking my head. “Uh…”

“Oh, stop. Come on. You won’t fall. I won’t let you.”

I gave him my hands, easier since I’d taken off my gloves. I’d done the same with my coat too since it wasn’t as cold in here as I’d believed it was when we first came in.

I took baby steps, looking as awkward as a baby deer on new legs. I paid more attention to that than my own feet, feeling stupid, and Ramses tugged at my hands.

“Look at me,” he said, making it easy to. He was so focused on me, everything about me in his eyes. He wouldn’t let me fall, bracing my hands with a smile. “Good. You’re doing it.”

I was, standing up even. From somewhere holiday tunes started to seep into the rink, and Ramses had a good chuckle at that.

“Probably the last time they’re going to get to do that for a while,” he said, acknowledging the music. Meshing our hands, he guided me close and kept me upright. “No one wants to hear Christmas music after December.”

I nudged him since I did like Christmas music after December and to my ultimate regret. I stumbled, taking him down with me, but not only did he catch himself, he caught me.

He braced me, chuckling as we both hovered over the ice. “Hey, that’s cheating,” he said. “Trying to make me drop you.”

I wasn’t trying to make him drop anything, what I’d done stupid.

Kind of like this moment.

I knew because, when he tugged me toward him, I didn’t pull away. At least not at first. I let him close his eyes and even brush our noses together. I let him get that close because things were easier with him. There was no heartache, no work, and that was easier. Being with Ramses Mallick would be the best thing for me…

So why did I push a hand between us?

His breath clouded the air when he opened his eyes, and righting me, he just held my hands. He didn’t say a word, just looked at me.

“It’s not me,” he eventually said, staring away. He put space between us, and when he started to skate, I let him guide me away. He got quickly to the side of the ice, and after helping me back on stable ground, we sat together on the benches.

The silence deafened between us, me feeling guilt for pushing him away and whatever was going on inside his head.

“It’s not you?” I asked, referencing what he’d said, and he nodded.

“It’s not. Never has been,” he said, glancing at me with a little smile. It didn’t quite reach his eyes. “Never has been, has it?”

It took me a second, a harsh one, to realize what he was saying. Ultimately, I couldn’t admit the answer to his question, though. I didn’t want to hurt him, nor did I want to be foolish myself. Wanting to be with anyone but him was illogical. He was perfect, more than. Ramses had his flaws, yes, but so did anyone. He was a good person, made me lau

gh.

I gripped arms around my body, really fucking stupid. I made myself think things were a certain way between us, probably ignored things a time or two when I shouldn’t have.