“I’ll say!” Mrs. Cade looks over the Halloween display and purses her lips. “Do you think Sasha would like those?”
“We have black roses coated with glitter. I think she’d like those the best.” The stabbing pain in my chest from talking about Sasha is still there, but it’s getting more manageable every day. The only problem is that now there are so many other things I can’t talk about.
“I’ll take a dozen black glittery roses,” Mrs. Cade says, reaching into her purse for her wallet. “I agree that Sasha will totally get a kick out of them.”
“Are you taking them to her grave?” I ask as I pick out the prettiest roses we have and wrap them up with purple and orange ribbon.
She doesn’t say where she’s going, but she knows I know. “You could come with me, if you’d like …”
“I get off at six,” I say, glancing at the clock. Still twenty minutes to go.
“Perfect. I’ll just have a coffee across the street and then come back and get you, okay?”
“Sounds good.” I smile, but I am feeling some pain. I’m not only keeping this epic secret about Sasha’s life, I’m also lying to Mrs. Cade about my own life. Elijah is my friend now, maybe something more. But it won’t ever happen if he has to stay hidden in the dark.
***
Seven days. No emails, no carrier pigeons, no message written in the clouds. Nothing from Elijah. I sit cross-legged on my bed, my laptop in front of me, checking again. It blows my mind that he doesn’t have a phone. They sell cheap prepaid phones at gas stations. If I didn’t think he’d stubbornly refuse it, I’d buy him one myself.
I take a deep breath. It’s Saturday, and I have a lunch date at the Cades’ house in an hour. Mrs. Cade invited me over when we were at the cemetery yesterday. I don’t know how I’ll get through yet another meal with my best friend’s parents and pretend that nothing has changed. Still, I have to do it for Sasha.
Before I take a shower, I walk into my closet and stare at the bag on the floor. It’s hidden, a shoulder bag slumped next to a bunch of my other crap, and only I know what’s inside. Elijah’s work shirt.
Bending down, I reach inside and pull out the shirt, like I’ve done almost every day since the concert. It’s embarrassing, but this is my only link to the guy who disappears until Sasha calls us back together.
I run my fingers over the stitching of his name. It’s the only thing that confirms he’s a real person, not just some email address of ones and zeros online, pretending to be real. He is real, and I’ve seen him and touched him and talked to him. I just have to have faith that I’ll hear from him again. Then I get an idea.
Monterrey’s Auto Body Shop stares at me from the patch on Elijah’s shirt. I pull out my phone and search the business name, finding an address in just a few seconds. It’s a fifty-minute drive from my house. A surge of excitement rises in me as I stare at the shirt in my hand.
After lunch with the Cades, I’m going to give Elijah’s shirt back.
***
The smell of takeout Chinese food fills the air on the Cades’ patio. I fill my plate with some of everything. Mr. Cade is in a cheery mood today, and he’s even wearing cargo shorts and a polo shirt, which is about as casual as the man gets. Mrs. Cade wears a lavender pantsuit and a string of pearls around her neck. They’re a picture-perfect wealthy married couple, from the outside. Inside, they’re still broken with grief.
Sunny, who usually begs for food at any opportunity, lies on the patio with his head against the leg of Sasha’s chair. When I call his name, his eyes flit to me but he doesn’t move. I slide my chair back, take a piece of chicken off my plate and kneel down next to him.
“Sweet and sour chicken,” I say, holding it out to him. “Sasha’s favorite.”
He eats the chicken, then leans into my hand when I scratch behind his ears. He’s seventy in dog years, so in a way, he’s spent more time with Sasha than even I did. “I love you, doggie,” I whisper to him, repeating what Sasha always said. He just stares at me, his unmoving tail a sign that the happiness has been taken away from him.
I have an okay time at lunch. We talk about Mr. Cade’s job and how he’s had several successful wins for his clients lately. Mrs. Cade tells us about her new ladies’ group and how she’s made a few friends. She hasn’t told them about Sasha, and we agree that she shouldn’t feel pressured to talk about it if she doesn’t want to. For now, the Cades are just trying to find a new life, one that goes on day after day without a daughter.
They ask me about school and work, and if I’m still planning on becoming a veterinarian after I graduate. I have to stop myself several times from mentioning anything too … revealing. Basically, I spend an hour talking in circles around the safe topics of school and work.
I stay for a cup of coffee, not exactly becaus
e I want it but because Mr. Cade gets a work call and heads to his office, and Mrs. Cade acts like she doesn’t want me to leave just yet. I plan on heading straight to Austin when this is over, but I’m not going to rush this time with Sasha’s parents. They need me more than I need them.
Mrs. Cade messes with her coffee maker. There’s a weird vibe in the air, and I get the feeling she wants to tell me something but hasn’t quite worked up the guts to say it yet. A sliver of fear slips up my spine. Can she tell I’m hiding something from her?
But when she finally turns around, stirring her sugar cube into her coffee and taking a seat next to me at the kitchen island, I’m pretty sure it’s not that.
“Are you okay?” I ask just to break the silence.
“Oh sweetheart,” she says slowly, staring into her coffee. “I don’t think I’ll ever be okay again. But yes, I am fine right now.” She takes a sip and then cradles the coffee mug in her hands, her soft brown eyes searching mine. “There is something I wanted to talk to you about.”
The way she says it eases my nerves. I know it’s not about Elijah. “I’m here,” I say. “For anything you need.”