Fate has a cruel way of giving you exactly what you want, only to leave you worrying that you’ll lose it forever.
In the end, I finally mustered up the energy to emerge from my closet, and Ash made a big deal about how horrendously perfect his sister and I looked as zombies.
The party was held in a barn that had been repurposed as a guest house, but like, if your guests were people you hated. It was huge and had an open floor plan. The crappy little kitchen was built out of discount cabinetry, was full of stuff they probably bought in the clearance aisle at a Home Depot. The furniture was falling apart, smelled like livestock and was probably fifty years old. I didn’t even want to know what the bathroom looked like, so I made sure I didn’t drink much that I would have to find out.
Shelby met up with Jake as soon as we arrived, and they disappeared into the crowd of people. Ash held my hand as we wove our way through the party, saying hello to people we knew. We weren’t drinking and mostly everyone else was, so in a way it felt like we were the only two people here. Ash was dressed as Dracula, with a cape his mother had sewn and those plastic vampire teeth that never really stay in place when you talk. Ash fielded a ton of questions about why he didn’t dress like Bob Marley because of the dreads. After about the fifth time I heard him answer, “Who the hell is Bob Marley?” I pulled him aside.
“You know who Bob Marley is, right?” I asked.
He looked toward the unfinished roof and let out a long breath. “Yeah. I’m just sick of being compared to him because of my hair. We have like nothing in common besides the dreads, especially since I don’t smoke pot.”
“Well you play guitar and sing so . . .” I said, poking him in the stomach. “You have a little in common.”
His frustration melted into a warm smile of appreciation as he looked me over, somehow seeing past all the makeup and taking me in as I normally am. “You’re really beautiful,” he whispered, taking both of my hands in his.
“I guess I did a terrible job of looking like an animated corpse,” I said, squishing my lips to the side. “I’m supposed to be grotesque.”
He leaned down and kissed me and then cradled my face in his hands. “You smell like Sephora, not the walking dead.”
I laughed a little and reached my blood-covered hands around his silky vampire cape. I let myself get lost in his dark eyes and let all of the party noise fall away as I stared at him. We’d only been together a couple of months, but they were the best months of my life. “I’m so glad we’re both home for Halloween,” I said, lacing my fingers together behind his neck.
He gripped me around the waist and pulled me into a quick hug before meeting my gaze again. Something in his expression shifted and a knot formed in my stomach. “What is it?”
His tongue ran across his bottom lip, slowly, as if he was thinking about something. Finally, his lips parted and he shook his head slightly. “Nah . . . it’s—nothing.”
My brows pulled together. “Ash Carter. You’re clearly keeping something from me.”
He grinned, his eyes crinkling in that way that always made my heart melt. “Yeah, I am.”
I crumpled my face into a pout. “That’s mean. I thought you were a nice boyfriend.”
He grabbed the sides of his cape and wrapped them around me, pulling me against his hard chest until we were in our own little black satin world. “I am a nice boyfriend,” he whispered into my ear. The stubble on his chin tickled my cheek and I tilted my head, letting it nuzzle against his chest, right in between his neck and collarbone, the place I fit perfectly when we were together.
The radio started playing a slow song with a deep bass beat and Ash began to sway to the music, letting his chin rest on top of my head.
“You should tell me what you’re thinking,” I murmured into his shirt while we rocked slowly to the beat. He smelled so wonderful I’m not sure why I ever let myself get more than a few inches away from him.
“I will, Hana.” I felt his lips press onto my hair. “I’m just not sure a dumb Halloween party is the best place to tell you that I’m completely in love with you.”
I lifted my head and pulled back a little so that I could look at him. My heart was beating so fast it made my nose feel numb. “What was that?” I asked, aiming for coy and flirty, not shy and nervous.
Ash ran a hand over his dreadlocks and gave me this knowing look. “Oh it’s nothing it’s just . . . yeah,” he said, taking out his plastic vampire teeth. “I’m in love with you.”
Chapter 10
Maybe Ash did smell like airplane. The moment he walks down the hallway, all showered and dressed in dark jeans and a red T-shirt that fits him a little more tightly than it used to, I can smell the cleanness of him. The citrusy soap he uses, the manly scent of his cologne. Shelby and I look up from the couch in the living room, where we’d been playing a Jenga game her little brother, Shawn, had left on the coffee table.
“Ready?” Shelby asks. She frowns at a middle piece of the game and then carefully shoves her finger into it and knocks it out. The tower wobbles but remains standing.
“Yeah, but I’m not really feeling pizza,” Ash says. He lifts an arm and scratches the back of his neck. I turn my attention back to the game although all I want to do is stare at his bicep. God, Hana. What is wrong with you?
“Then what do you want?” Shelby asks.
I lean forward, looking for a wobbly piece of the Jenga game.
“Burger Barn?” Ash says. “The guys are all about sushi and fancy steakhouses. I’ve been dying for a regular freaking burger.”
“Sounds good,” Shelby says, slapping her knees. “Hana, are you ready? Or do you want to play this stupid game forever?”