The sun shines brightly over the white sand at Research. I want to tug off my boots, roll up the legs of my suit and drop to the sand to bask in it. I could make sand angels for hours and then wash off all the sand in the clear blue ocean water. This happens to me every time I arrive on the private island of Research where Evan works and lives. Every. Single. Time.
One of these days the temptation to run away from my life and live out my days on this beautiful oceanfront with Evan might be more than I can overcome. I don’t know how many of the elders’ secrets and lies and hidden information can be kept from me before I break. My jaw hurts from how tightly I’ve been clenching it.
Evan calls out from his third floor balcony. “Hey, beautiful! Come on up.”
I think about telling him to leave the computer and come down here to me. To kick off his shoes and lie with me in the sand, watching the clouds drift by like parade floats on New Year’s Day.
But that isn’t how a Hero would act. So I jog through the sand, leaving my daydreams behind with my footprints.
“So where’d they’d hide it?” I ask the moment I step out of the glass elevator. Evan pops out of his computer chair and it swivels around in a circle. He’s wearing his nerdy glasses and I can’t help but smile. He kisses me quickly on the lips and asks if I want anything to drink.
“No babe, I don’t want a drink.” I poke him in the stomach before he has time to flex his abs. “But I would like the location of that machine, pretty please.”
He makes a face. “I haven’t been able to hack into the system yet.”
“Wow, Letta. You should brush up on your hacking skills. I asked you like ten minutes ago. That’s plenty of time for a world class Super hacker to work his magic.”
“Unfortunately it’s not magic. And don’t call me Letta.” He pokes me right back in the stomach and then slides his hand around my back. “I preferred the babe you said earlier.”
His lips head toward mine and I lift up on my toes to kiss him, but only for a second. Then I playfully push him away and give him my serious look. “Hack now, kiss later. Chop chop!”
Evan’s frustration can be felt throughout the entire room. I hold back my sighs, eye rolls, groans and impatient foot-tapping because I know it isn’t his fault he can’t hack into the system. He’s doing everything he can to help me and I’m grateful for it. When his stomach starts growling in defiance, I put my hand on his shoulder. “We can stop now. I
’m hungry, too.”
He types one more thing into his computer, shoulders tensing until the screen refreshes. He sighs. “Sorry, Mace. I’ve tried everything I know. They changed the entire mainframe in the last few weeks.”
“I’ll just have to hope that Dad pulls through and finds it for me.”
“So they’re really letting him be president again, huh?” Evan asks, stepping into the glass elevator with me. He smiles. “I was going to vote for him if they had another election. My mom and cousins were, too. We all think he can lead the Supers without powers.”
“Thanks. He’d appreciate that.” The doors close and we ascend to the top floor. I lean back, letting my shoulders press against his chest as we lift through the floors of Research. Evan’s chin rests on top of my head. In moments like these, where I really love my current situation--whether I’m curled up with Evan on the couch or enjoying a massive ice cream sundae with Crimson--I can never fully enjoy them like I could before I became a Hero. Now all of my perfect moments that I wish could last forever are tainted with the anxiety that I could be called out on a mission at any second.
Evan’s fridge has four kinds of leftover pizza, which he heats up on a frying pan on the stove because he claims it makes the crust perfectly crunchy and the cheese melty and not sticky like when pizza is reheated in a microwave. I offer to help, I swear I do, but Evan shoos me away, claiming he doesn’t mind cooking for us at all. So instead of being useful, I sit on a barstool and swirl my fingers around the countertop of the kitchen island, which is one big digital screen depicting an aquarium. The digital fish scatter in different directions when my finger gets close to them. “You did a great job of cleaning this place up after they demolished it,” I say. Then, in an epic change of subject, I find myself saying, “I really hate how Nova keeps outshining me.”
Chills prickle over my arms. For a moment, I’m not even sure I said those words out loud. But then Evan says, “What makes you think she’s outshining you?” All the blood pools to my cheeks in embarrassment. I cup my head in my hands, elbows on the counter and pretend to be really interested in the fake aquarium.
A plate of crunchy-crusted pizza slides under my face. Evan sits opposite of me with his own plate of food. “You can talk to me,” he says. His voice is kind and caring and not mocking or mean. “I hope you know that.”
“You can’t tell anyone.” I give him a warning glance. He shrugs with a mouthful of food. “Who would I tell?”
I shake my head. “I’ve never been so conflicted in my life. I don’t regret bringing her back. Part of me loves her because she is my sister. She’s my blood. I can feel her emotions. We’re connected. I don’t want anything bad to happen to her.” I swallow, hoping the next words I say won’t change Evan’s opinion of me. With a deep breath, I say, “Sometimes I wish she didn’t exist.”
“Why is that?”
I look at him and he’s all sincerity and kindness. He has a Hero’s demeanor without being a Hero. He is good and I am evil. Inherently. It’s not like I want to be. It’s not like I enjoy feeling anger and rage and a desire to prove everyone wrong. His blue eyes peer at me over his glasses and I sigh. “Because she’s better than me. She’s nicer and kinder. And people like her more.”
“That isn’t true,” Evan says but I talk over him. “She has these brilliant freaking ideas, like all the time.” I throw my arms in the air. “Every single time there’s a problem and us Heroes are trying to figure it out, because we’re the Heroes and we’re supposed to figure things out, she’ll just walk in with her sweet little voice and say ‘oh blah blah, here’s your answer. Here’s the exact perfect idea you needed but couldn’t think of.’ It’s so annoying, Evan. I can’t stand it.”
“Would you be this upset if someone else had the ideas? If it wasn’t Nova?”
I chew on a slice of pizza and think about it a while. “Probably not. Maybe. I don’t know.”
“I think you’re being too hard on her,” Evan says after a while.
“We’re all risking getting depowered because of her. She could at least stay away from us and stop putting in her two cents every time we have a problem.”
Evan laughs. “But I thought her two cents helped you guys solve the problems?”