“Perhaps he doesn’t mean it.” Blake patted her shoulder. “You know how Rufus can be, especially when he’s been drinking.”
“He hasn’t been drinking,” she sobbed. “It’s…it’s some whore. A child from the pub where he takes his midday meal. I should have known there was something wrong when he stopped returning home for his nap.”
“I don’t know what to say,” Blake muttered.
“I don’t want you to say anything.” Grace looked up at him, her face sad and wet with tears.
Though he knew she cheated on her husband, he also knew that she loved her husband and that she was truly devastated.
“Just hold me,” she whispered. “Make me feel something good, just for a little while.”
She kissed him on the mouth and, at first, he resisted. In the back of his mind, he thought of Sapphire and of the word they had talked about the other night. The word that scared him more than he could admit to her or himself. He had asked her if she wanted him to say it, to say that he loved her. She hadn’t answered him and he didn’t know what that meant. Did she think she loved him, or was this part of her game to get what she could from him?
Blake didn’t know how he felt about Sapphire. But even if he did love her, if he gave in to her and said so, where would it lead him? How long would it last before she left him? Or saw him for the man he really was, leave taking what she could and then move on to the next man?
Grace’s insistent mouth slowly pushed aside his thoughts. She was a beautiful woman whom he had made love to many times. What reason did he have not to make love to her again?
“Blake,” she whispered, grasping his shirt, looking up at him with teary eyes. “Love me,” she begged.
He kissed her back and closed his eyes.
Downstairs in the kitchen, Sapphire busied herself cleaning up after the evening meal. Next, she began to clean off the old wooden table Mrs. Porter used to make bread each day. As she scrubbed viciously with a rag, she fought her tears.
In time, Myra appeared and moved to stand beside her, scraping damp flour off the table with a flat-edged blade. More than an hour had passed since Mrs. Sheraton arrived, and she’d still not left by the front door.
“I heard Mrs. Sheraton pushed her way into the master’s bedchamber,” Myra whispered.
“How do you know that?” Sapphire glanced at her friend. Unlike the others on the household staff, Mrs. Dedrick was not a gossip. She took her post as head housekeeper too seriously for that.
“Felicity saw her go bargin’ up the stairs.” She looked sideways at Sapphire. “Said you were still inside with the master.”
“Myra, I knew Blake from London.” Sapphire’s voice was thick with emotion.
“Thought as much,” Myra said. “So you come already in love with him?”
Sapphire nodded, afraid to speak for fear she would start to cry.
“Poor thing.” Myra put out one arm and gave her a quick hug. “And now he’s upstairs dallyin’ with Mrs. Sheraton.”
Sapphire threw down the washrag. Myra was only voicing what Sapphire had already feared. She had seen the look on Mrs. Sheraton’s face when Mrs. Dedrick closed the bedchamber door. She knew what the older woman wanted from Blake.
“You think so?”
Myra looked up as if she could see through the timber and plaster walls to the upstairs rooms. “It’s t’ be expected. You know, she’s been comin’ to his bedchamber for years. Everyone in the house knows it.”
“I didn’t know—” Sapphire’s throat caught. All her silly hopes seemed to disappear in an instant. Blake didn’t love her. If he did, he wouldn’t have allowed Mrs. Sheraton to stay. He wouldn’t have allowed Mrs. Dedrick to lead Sapphire downstairs so he could be alone with his guest.
“Even when I still worked for her, we all knew. Some of us even said ‘good fer her.’ You know, what being good for the gander.”
Sapphire wiped her nose, trying to form a plan in her head. “I need you to help me.”
“Of course.” Myra clasped her arm. “You want to find a job elsewhere, I can see what I can do. More than likely Mrs. Dedrick would even help you, considerin’ the circumstances. She’s mostly bark, you know. Underneath, she’s got a good heart.”
Sapphire shook her head. “No, you don’t understand. I’m not a lady’s maid.” She lifted her lashes to look into Myra’s eyes. “I’m a lady,” she whispered. “And I need to return to London to my family.”
Myra stared but didn’t question her. Somehow she seemed to know that Sapphire was telling the truth. “I haven’t much money—most I give to my mama for the babies—but you can have what I got.”
“I wouldn’t take your money, Myra. I just need some clothes, a few other necessities.”