Tavish leaned back, his boots propped up on the table, scuffing the polished wood. He stared at me, not saying anything. We had taken a break from our discussions and were holed up in Bodeen’s office while the other officers ate their midday meal in the meeting chamber.
Sven stood and looked out the window. “Don’t worry, boy. All this will fall into place. It’s a lot to take in at once.”
“Boy?” Tavish said. “He’s the blooming king now.”
“He can strip it from my hide.”
I pushed my plate away. “It’s not just court matters on my mind. It’s Lia. She had a run-in with Hague.”
Sven grunted. “So? Everyone has run-ins with Hague. Nothing to worry about.”
“What about the other officers?” I asked. “Have any of you gotten a sense how they feel about her?”
“They don’t hold her kingdom against her,” Tavish said flatly. “Belmonte, Armistead, and Azia were like captivated pups when they met her.”
Sven squinted, continuing to look at something out the window. “That’s all you’re worried about? If they like her?”
No. That wasn’t even half of it. Out on the veranda I had seen her eyes—they spoke as much as her words before I cut her off. I had avoided the subject on our way here by stressing that our only goal was to reach the safety of the outpost. But now we were here. Her questions were harder to avoid. I leaned forward, rubbing my temples. “No. That’s not all I’m worried about. She wants to go home.”
Sven spun back to look at me. “To Morrighan? Why would she want to do a fool thing like that?”
“She thinks she needs to warn them about the Vendan army.”
“The Komizar may have conveyed his big plans to her, but that doesn’t mean they were a reality,” Sven said. “When was anything he said not tainted by his own ambitions?” He reminded me that even some of the governors thought he had inflated his numbers.
Orrin licked his fingers. “And a few thousand soldiers can look like a hell of a lot more when you’re frightened.”
“But we’ve known for some time that their numbers were growing,” I said. “It’s what helped push us toward a marriage alliance with Morrighan.”
Sven rolled his eyes. “There were many motivations for that.”
“And numbers aren’t the same as an army with centuries of training and experience like we have,” Tavish countered. “Not to mention they no longer have a viable leader.”
Jeb frowned. “But there was that small flask of liquid Lia gave to Rafe to blow up the bridge. That’s a weapon none of the kingdoms have.”
“And it took out the main gear, which had to be twelve feet of solid iron,” I said. “It’s a worry.”
Sven sat back down. “There are not bridges on a battlefield, and brezalots can be taken down, assuming they even march. The Council members will eat one another alive long before they ever get that bridge fixed.”
Orrin reached for another chop. “You’re king. You just tell her she can’t go.”
Tavish snorted. “Tell her? You don’t just tell a girl like her that she can’t do something,” he said, then turned a long, dissecting stare at me. He shook his head. “Oh, holy hell. You already told her you’d take her there, didn’t you?”
I blew out a puff of air and looked up at the ceiling. “I may have.” I pushed back my chair and stood, pacing the room. “Yes! I did! But it was a long time ago, back at the Sanctum. I told her what she needed to hear at the moment, that we’d go back to Terravin. One day. I didn’t say when. I was just trying to give her hope.”
Sven shrugged. “So you told her what was expedient at the time.”
Tavish sucked in a slow breath. “A lie. That’s how she’ll see it.”
“It wasn’t a lie. I thought that maybe someday I’d be able to take her back there, a long time from now if things change, but for the gods’ sakes, there’s a bounty on her head now, and the Morrighese cabinet is thick with traitors. I’d be insane to let her go back.”
“She’s probably facing a noose there now,” Orrin agreed. He rubbed his neck. “Isn’t that how they execute their criminals?”
Tavish shot him a glare. “You’re not helping.”
“The girl loves you, boy,” Sven said. “Any fool can see she wants to be with you. Just tell her what you told us. She’s a girl of reason.”
Sven’s words cut the deepest. I turned away, pretending I was looking at a relic hanging on the wall. I saw her struggle every day. Some part of Venda still had its claws in her—and some part of Morrighan did too. Reason with her? It is hard to find reason when you’re being torn in two. Part of her heart was in both kingdoms and none of it was in Dalbreck.