Perfectly Toxic (Sterling Shore 9)

“So the night I lashed out, you were coming to tell me you loved me, and to possibly admit you’re carrying my child.”

It doesn’t sound like a question, so I don’t respond. I stay frozen in place, halfway to Angel’s room, uncertainty keeping me where I am.

“And I made you think I was fucking Star,” he goes on.

He sounds so calm, as though he’s talking aloud about the weather. Suddenly, he stands, and I screech when he slams his fist into the wall, punching a hole through the plaster.

He presses his forehead against the wall as he pulls his bloody fist out, and tears gather in my eyes. Obviously the calm is just on the surface, because he’s explosive on the inside right now.

“I should look at your hand. It’s—”

“It’s fine. Tell Wren I’ll fix his wall when I fix the rest of this. I… I need a minute. Answer when I call,” he says, sounding so calm again despite the storm I know is going on inside of him.

“I will,” I say, my voice barely above a whisper as I back against the wall behind me.

He keeps his back to me. “I mean it, Bella. Answer when I call, because I will be calling.”

He knows about our child, so there’s no longer any use in living in denial about us… About what we might be. The illusion has been irrevocably shattered, and the reality has been painted clearly in its place.

He punched a hole through the wall instead of scooping me into his arms.

That hope we’d be a happily-ever-after family is now gone. Just as I knew it would be. It’s time to face the grim truth of my situation, even if I’m not ready to let go of the dream.

“Bella,” he says harshly, reminding me I’m supposed to speak, even though he won’t face me.

“I promise.”

Those words are the magic ones, because he turns and walks out without ever glancing in my direction again.

I slide down the wall I’m against until I’m sitting on the floor and staring at the hole Ethan left behind.

That hole is symbolic, since it feels like my heart has one the same size made by the same person.

Maybe one day we can be friends. Being friends is better than being enemies when you have a child together.

Maybe one day he’ll stop hating me enough to get to that place.

Chapter 66

ETHAN

I didn’t sleep. I also didn’t call anyone.

I doubt any of the guys knew, but I’ll bet most of the women did.

I shouldn’t have punched Wren’s wall or lost my temper. It’s obvious Bella already thinks I’m shitty father material, considering the obvious. I can’t be pissed at her, because she’s carrying my baby and there’s no way in hell I can take my anger out on her while she’s pregnant. But I can fucking be pissed at everyone else.

My baby.

It doesn’t seem real. But it is.

Showing up unannounced is a specialty of mine, so Tag doesn’t bat an eye when I walk into his house without warning.

“You okay?” he asks, apparently in the know now. “Need a drink?”

“No. No drinking. Why’s everyone here?”

I saw all the cars outside, but haven’t question it until now.