“Stop. I don’t need to hear the rest to know he convinced the police she was the problem.” Noah says nothing, and I’m hoping my partner is smarter than those other cops and not believing this shit. “Come over as soon as you can. You need to take a look at Thea. She’s a fucking mess, man. Whatever this guy has done, he’s left her in fear of her life.”
“On my way.” After hanging up, I order pizza I don’t feel like eating and put on coffee I know we’re going to need. If I want Thea to stop running and be able to move on from her past, to help her heal, I recognize that I need to take charge and show her that Noah and I are on her side. That we’ll have the entire department on her side.
Chapter 8
Thea
Eyes popping open, I struggle to acclimate to where I am. I can’t catch my bearings as I realize I’m in a bed in a room that isn’t my apartment. Then I remember my place was broken into, violated, destroyed by anger and fueled by hate. I remember my life has been thrown into another whirlwind where I’m left to pick up pieces that I’m not certain I want to.
Flipping back the blankets that are covering me, I see the moon shining through the thin curtains that cover the window and gravitate towards it. The night is clear, and I desperately want to believe that what I’m recalling in my mind from the past few hours is nothing more than a bad dream.
But it’s not. I feel it in my bones.
Kol witnessed my breakdown.
Ember realizes I’m back.
And my secrets have been revealed.
Why Kol thought to keep me here instead of admitting me into some psych ward is beyond me. Counting the few stars I see in the sky, I wonder which one my dad is. Which one is watching as I fail at the life I was given? I’ve spent so many years wondering if he’d have been proud of me for trying to find justice for myself or if he’d have gotten it for me himself.
I’ve always wanted to evolve into a woman he could have been proud to call his own blood. Gazing around me, I feel certain he wouldn’t be pleased with the cowering woman I’ve become. I split when things get too hard, when I make connections.
I run.
It’s what I do best.
And now? With my secret out, the desire to do so again is stronger than ever before. I don’t know how I’ll face Kol and Ember now that they know who and what I am.
“Hey, you’re up.” Ember’s soft voice calls from behind me.
“I should leave,” I say absent-mindedly, still staring at the sky.
I can feel her presence as she walks closer to me. Standing next to me, Ember doesn’t try to touch me. She’s always respected my need for space. “You left once, Thea. Isn’t it time to stay and fight? Whether you realize it or not, you have family here.”
“Family has caused me nothing but anguish my whole life,” I respond. The idea of having more family is terrifying.
“I don’t know what happened to you, Thea, but I’m here if you need me. Silently, if that’s what’s necessary.” I want that. A friend. A true friend. Which is what Ember has always been if I think about it.
“We were poor. When I was younger.” The warmth and support Ember emits helps to ease out some of the words. “I don’t remember my dad. I can sometimes feel the memory of his love. I can imagine a smile or laugh. But his face? I don’t recollect that. Or the way he hugged. I don’t know what he smelled like. Sometimes I imagine cedar because I grew up around cedar trees, but I don’t really know.” It hurts to think about just how much I don’t know about my father.
“I can’t imagine,” Ember whispers. As we stand in silence, Em is Em, and even though she doesn’t push my boundaries, she has her ways of getting to me, and as I feel her pinky wrap around mine, the walls start crumbling down around my mind and heart.
“I used to dream of a life with Dad in it. I would dream that even though he were dead, he would come back as a new father. My mom would fall madly in love, and we’d be a family a
gain.” My stress bleeds out in my words.
“I would dream that my mom and dad came back after they first passed away,” Ember whispers. Her own pain makes me look at her.
“Your parents were wonderful. I’ve always been able to feel their love in the stories you’ve told me.” Looking away, she nods, and I understand what she’s feeling because I live with it every day. “When he first came into our lives, I was excited. I wanted to get to know him. I wanted him to like me. To love me the way I imagined my father used to.”
Em’s entire hand grips mine, now, and I can feel how tense she is. Even without me saying it, she knows what’s coming. “They married quickly, and at first, things were okay. Richard had always been cold and distant until one day he wasn’t.”
“Thea…”
“I was always a dreamer. I believed in love at first sight, fairytales, and never-ending happiness. I believed that one day I would find a man who would love me with his entire being, and because of that love, I would give him my most precious gift.”
“Thea, don’t.” Ember’s crying more than I am, and she knows the words will be just as hard for her to hear as they will be for me to say.