Tiny arms wrapping around her thigh brought her out of her regretful thoughts. Crouching down to meet Andy’s eyes, she smiled, softly whispering, “Hi, sweetheart.”
He wasn’t much of a talker, so his happy smile was enough to warm her heart.
“Ready to go?” His loud squeal of excitement was answer enough for her.
Getting off the bus, they walked hand in hand the two blocks to the downtown YMCA. She’d never brought him to this one before. The last time Ev had taken him to any type of activity was a swimming class over a year ago, not long after she’d found him and Lacey.
Being in a room full of people—especially strangers—had her heart rate speeding up, her breathing becoming choppy. Large crowds always scared her. She had no clue why especially given what she did for a living. When she danced, though, she was free, free of the loneliness. Free of the pain of the past. Being around happy families reminded her of everything she would never have.
As soon as they entered the small room where the class was held, she felt suffocated. Standing off to the side away from everyone, she tried to even out her breathing. It wasn’t until Andy happily yelled, “Jax!” and ran to another little blond-haired boy that she relaxed a fraction.
Him being here eased her pain; his happiness helped ease her panic. Watching as Andy and his friend ran to the center of the room and began playing together, she envied the ease in which they interacted. She couldn’t remember a time in her life when she had that.
Movement from the corner of her eye had her freezing, almost vibrating with the urgency to run. When she saw that it was Andy’s friend’s mom, she calmed down slightly.
“Hi, I’m Deedee, Jaxson’s mom.” She seemed friendly enough.
Looking around for what she wasn’t sure, she finally took her hand and said, “Evelyn Moore, Andy’s aunt.”
“Nice to meet you. Where’s Lacey?” Deedee inquired.
She felt ready to jump out of her skin with all her questions. “She had to work, and Andy wanted to come.” At her nod and quietness, Ev finally felt comfortable enough to let
out the breath it felt like she was holding.
It wasn’t long before the class began, and she was required to participate with her nephew. They sang nursery rhymes that Ev remembered from her own childhood, not because her mom sang to her but because she had a neighbor who’s mom used to sing them all the time.
Her pocket began vibrating non-stop, so she was finally forced to stop playing with Andy to check.
Lacey: I need you to come get me now.
Ev: What? Why? We’re in the middle of this class you refused to come to. I had to lie for you!
She wasn’t happy that when she was finally feeling like she could handle being there that Lacey wanted her to leave to probably come clean up yet another one of her messes.
Lacey: Fine. Whatever. I’ll just bleed out on the sidewalk, and you’ll be saddled with the kid.
Ev: What’s happening?
Lacey: What do you care?
Sighing in defeat, she knew they were leaving. That whatever Lacey had done, Ev was about to pay the price for.
Ev: On our way.
With the weight of the world on her shoulders, she whispered in Andy’s ear, “We have to go now.” Seeing his shoulders slump in sadness, she hated her sister in that moment.
“Come on, Lace, pick up, dammit.” She attempted to call her sister a dozen times since they left Andy’s class, only to get no answer or be sent directly to voicemail each time. With no idea where to pick her sister up, they were left with no other choice than to go back home.
Andy held her hand so tight like he thought she was going to leave him. Gazing down at his tiny body, she couldn’t imagine not having him in her life and was petrified that if Lacey kept up whatever it was that she doing, that was exactly what would happen. Whether to the foster system or as a casualty of his mother’s careless actions remained to be seen.
With every bump the bus went over, he squeezed her fingers that much tighter. What he didn’t know was that she needed the reassurance too. The connection they seemed to have was unbreakable. It was something she would hold on to for the rest of her life. She would be the rock when he needed one, the shoulder to cry on when he was sad. She would be his home for as long as she was able.
The phone buzzing in her hand startled her for a moment. Looking down, she saw Lacey’s name flash across the display. “Lacey? Where are you?” she whispered angrily.
“Evie-booooo,” she sang back. Evelyn could immediately tell she was high. “I had a accident.”
Do not lose your patience, Ev. Not everyone needed to know that drugs were far more important to her sister than the little boy currently clinging to her.