I freeze when his rough hand brushes my hair to the side of my neck, his fingers grazing my flesh as he does it. “I missed you.” His possessive words feather warm air along the back of my neck, and I can’t halt the shiver if I tried.
One hand settles on my hip while his other presents me with a gift. The same envelope as twice before, along with a small box, piques my curiosity.
“This is for you. I’ll bring the groceries in. Go on inside.” Gathering the items from his hand out of sheer politeness, I don’t hesitate to do as he says when he gently nudges me forward. It’s not the gift in the box that has anticipation rushing through my veins with the speed of a freight train.
It’s the note.
Each one has been intensely personal, and I have no idea what he’ll profess this time.
Unlocking the house, I stride to the sofa and place the offering on the table before gently easing open the envelope. As I shake out the paper, tears sting my eyes as I read.
We share a passion I couldn’t resist.
It’s nothing fancy or poetic, but it’s Noah. He’s showing me with choice sweet words that he never forgot about me during the months we didn’t speak.
“Have you eaten dinner yet?” Noah asks as he enters the house, closing and locking the door behind himself.
“No,” I call out. Unaware of the emotional breakdown I’m edging on, he walks to the kitchen with the grocery bags and begins to put them away. Gazing at the box, I’m almost afraid to open it. I know he’s sorry for his silence, the secret omission, but I don’t want Noah feeling as though he has to buy me things for me to forgive him.
That’s not how I am.
I have this desire to make things clear, but I’m not certain how to go about it.
“Can I make you something?” he
calls back, and I get the feeling his actions are forced because Noah is not a domesticated man. But he’s trying to accommodate me with the things he believes I want.
I think.
“I was just going to have soup,” I say, standing with the gift box in my hand. Slowly walking into the kitchen, I take a seat on the stool at the island and stare at it as I turn it over in my hands. “I don’t want gifts, Noah.”
“I know.”
Looking up at him, he has still not stopped moving. “Do you?”
Sighing, he turns to face me, crossing his arms before he speaks. “Open it.” Knitting my brow, I do as he says and slowly lift the top off the box.
Letting out a gasp, I then inhale sharply at what I see. Emotion stings my throat as I gently remove the small plaque, lacquered with twigs of lilacs and lavender to frame my parents’ names and the day they died.
“How?” My voice is hoarse as I try to speak.
I see him shrug. “I’ve had some time on my hands.” He’s so nonchalant about such a thoughtful gift.
“Thank you, Noah.” Rising, I hurry around the corner of the island and wrap my arms around his waist. Placing my head against his chest, I listen to the thumping of his heart as he embraces me too.
“You’re welcome, Em.” I feel him kiss the top of my head, and it’s in this moment that I know we’re going to be alright. I’ve already forgiven him for his silence, but I haven’t made that clear to him, and I know I have to.
Tilting my head up, I don’t hesitate to lift up to my toes and place my lips against his. He’s still at first, not wanting to break the connection, but as soon as my tongue brushes across the seam of his lips, Noah takes control.
Gripping my hips, he lifts me onto the counter before stepping between my legs. The girth of his erection isn’t missed as he slowly thrusts against me. Friction from the rigid movements has me moaning into Noah’s mouth, and he doesn’t let up. If anything, it only reinforces his actions.
“Noah,” I gasp when he pulls back to trail kisses along my jaw and down the column of my throat. “I missed you.” I whimper when he bites on the pulse at the base of my neck, sucking on the flesh until I’m confident he’s left a mark.
Wrapping his arms around me, he holds me tight to his body, breathing into my neck, inhaling long, sharp breaths. Almost like he’s afraid to let me go. “I’m so fucking sorry, Em. For everything. All I wanted to do was shield you from every shitty thing in the world, and I wound up hurting you with my silence, with my lack of communication.”
My chin wobbles at his confession. I never doubted his intentions, it was the way he went about it, and now, seeing him so emotional, nearly as nutty as me, I know he’s been hurting as deeply as I have.
“I forgive you, Noah,” I murmur against his ear, kissing the lobe as he shudders in my arms. Witnessing such a large, imposing man so vulnerable has me feeling all kinds of things. “Can we go forward now? Move past all this pain and be us?”