As the days pass and my happiness grows, I keep waiting for the other shoe to drop. Every time I’ve had a single ounce of joy in my life, something horrible has happened to counteract my ever-expanding feelings.
I'm accepted into college: my parents die months later.
I become pregnant with Leslie and Miles' baby: they’re killed in an accident a month later.
I’m the most elated I’ve ever been in my life, and yet, I’m terrified tragedy is about to strike.
“Shit.” The muttered curse word has me spinning so quickly I nearly fall. Reed's strong arms wrap me up against his body. “What are you doing, pretty girl?”
His voice is gravelly, eyes are darker than usual, and if that's what I think it is, he’s grown hard in his pants. “Uhm… Well, I was checking out how the bruises were healing and got distracted.”
We’ve slept in the same bed every night since I came home from the hospital, but I’ve been too shy to change in front of him or even shower with him on one of the many occasions he’s invited me. So he’s never seen me naked, and now, I’m questioning how desirable I could possibly be to a man like him.
“Nicely, I see,” he groans.
“You’re home early,” I point out, neither of us making a move to separate.
“I am.” He doesn’t explain why. Biting his bottom lip, Reed’s eyes travel down my body in the mirror on the wall, and I can feel the blush creeping up my face.
Pulling back, I shiver with the loss of his warmth. Reed unbuttons his shirt, shedding it like it’s on fire. I watch fascinated as he continues to rid himself of his clothes until we’re both standing here naked.
Me, battered and bruised.
Him, masculine and potent.
Polar opposites of one another and yet exactly right.
“Reed.” I whisper his name like a prayer.
“Pretty girl.” He growls mine like a curse. Uninhibited and craving something my mind can’t comprehend but my body seems to. “Do you have any idea how many times I have pictured this moment? Imagined what our first time would be like. How you would feel and react.”
Reed wraps his arms around me again, skin to skin. Front to front. I’ve never been bombarded with so many feelings at once before. None of which I can identify except one.
An incredible desire to be with this man.
“About as many as me?” I bravely sigh.
“You been thinking about me, Hope?” I nod. “Good. But still probably more.” The raw honesty we share is something I’ve craved my entire life.
One more confession, though.
“I’ve never been with a man before, Reed.”
Everything quiets down, magnifying my declaration.
His fingers briefly tighten on my hips, igniting a flame deep in my core for him. So much strength and power reflected in the small gesture.
“I knew you were made for me.” He smiles before turning us to the bed. Gently guiding me to my back, Reed lays on top of me, careful not to put his full weight on my burgeoning stomach.
My heart contracts at the emotions I detect in Reed’s eyes, lining his face, and trembling his flesh. He’s allowing our bodies to do all the talking while I experience this moment for the first time.
As his hands tenderly trace along my collarbone, between the valley of my breasts, across my baby bump, and between my thighs, I fight not to close my eyes. I want to behold him, for him to behold me.
For us to acknowledge. To accede that we’re in this together, and nothing will stand in our way.
Lifting one of my legs into the crook of his elbow, Reed explores my folds with his other hand. Plays me like a finely tuned piano. When I feel, first, one finger nudging at my entrance and then another, I know I should feel some sort of discomfort, but as long as I can meet his stare, I feel nothing but decadence.
“Hope.” He moans my name, and I feel his hardened length tapping against my thigh as he tries to hold back from taking me too soon.