The only sound was the chirping of the late autumn crickets for a moment, and he took it in as the gridlocked tension in his chest eased for the first time in what felt like forever. Andy didn't open her eyes; she just lay on the ground, smiling and thoughtful.
Gorgeous.
So he thought over her speech again, and realized that he had more than one regret where the Archer family was concerned. If she could help him with one, then he was certain she could help him solve the other. He just had to convince her.
"Since we're getting all deep and spiritual—"
She snorted. "Is that what you call it?"
"For lack of a better word, I guess, yeah. But, can I ask you a question?"
She leaned up onto her elbows, eying him for a long moment before she said, "Shoot."
"Do you ever regret not spending more time together? Back in college, I mean."
She blinked twice, then said, "Sometimes.”
“It was weird. We used to, I think. I remember hanging out on a quad with you. The more I think about it, though, the more it seems like one day we just stopped being friends.”
"Do you remember inviting me to a Halloween party? Back in freshman year?”
He shook his head.
“I thought…well, I was an idiot, but I thought it was sort of like a date. I went to that party all dolled up and looking absurd." Her words were quiet and thoughtful. "I was there. For a few minutes, at least. You were already gone. Off with some girl." Her lids shielded her gaze from view, but he could feel the hurt in her words no matter how hard she was trying to hide it. “It was stupid, I know. But after that, it was too weird to be around you. I didn’t want to be hurt again. Especially not by you.”
“I was a fucking idiot.” His chest tightened, but he knew the words were true. If he could turn back time, he would have noticed her at that party. Hell, he might have stayed by the door all night just to get a look at her. If he could have changed his fate, he would have seen what a great girl she was back then. “I never meant to lead you on like that.”
She shrugged. "I was young and stupid. You were the star of the whole university. I should have known that I was just your friend's sister so you wanted me to tag along. I felt like such a fool. I mean, I know I'm not like all the other women in your repertoire but—"
"If I could go back and do it all differently, I would. You’re not like other women I’ve been with, but believe me when I tell you that it’s only to your credit." He repeated the word, trying to process all she'd said. It made so much sense now. The tension, the sudden avoidance tactics. She'd thought he'd led her on. Had played her. "I wish I could go back and make things different."
It was the truth. From the first moment they'd spent together that day, he couldn't imagine how he'd been away from her for so many years. She was so unique, such a bright contrast to all of the cookie cutter women he'd known, and imagining going back to a life without Andy already seemed completely unreasonable.
"If I’d had any sense, I would have known how incredible you are. And how beautiful," he said.
Her silence was on the edge of alarming him, but he didn't want to spook her by jumping the gun or forcing her to answer. He'd just have to be patient and wait.
Luckily, it was only another moment before she spoke again.
"Beautiful?" It was the most feminine she'd ever sounded. More vulnerable than when she'd been talking about her life or her problems. Like it was her deepest, darkest thought and she was offering it up to him, hoping he wouldn't smash it to pieces before her eyes.
He nodded. "All I want to do is make up for lost time."
He edged toward her, trailing a finger up from her knee to the hem of her skirt. "If
you'll let me."
* * *
The bright lights nearly blinded her before, but now they didn't matter. She couldn't see them or the stars or anything else. There wasn't any sight or sound or smell.
There was only the scalding heat of Logan's fingertip as he traced her skin, and the cool shivers of anticipation that flowed through her every nerve and set her body on edge.
It seemed fast. So much faster than any other encounter she'd had before. And with their history and her brother standing in their way, there was no hope of leaving it all behind them in the morning. From this moment, whenever she looked at Logan, it would either be with the knowledge that she'd denied him or that he'd known every part of her body.
With a choice like that, though, there was no contest to be had.
This time, she wasn’t about to let her brother or anything else hold her back. She’d been stupid before, letting her own insecurities stand in the way of living out her fantasy. She wasn’t about to let that happen again.