"What the hell," Zoe spluttered.
"I knew you wouldn't let me host it here if I told you the whole truth so I...I fibbed a little."
"A little?" Zoe gaped. "Are you kidding me?"
"Well, if you squint they do sort of look like candles. Maybe. And there are novelty candles for birthday cakes."
Zoe blinked her mouth this ajar.
"It's not that bad," Quinn said.
Zoe opened her mouth, closed it, then pointed at her sister with the enormous sex toy. "Not that bad? I have a herd of men in my basement who are going to be coming up and down the steps all night. You don't think they're going to notice what you're doing?"
"Notice? I hope they appreciate it and take an active interest. I haven't gotten laid in..." She didn't want to say how long. In truth, she and her ex fiancé hadn't had sex the month leading up to their wedding which made her dry spell an official drought. Which, by extension, made her lady parts something like the Sahara.
Which, she supposed, partly explained the sex toy party.
"You are not sleeping with any of Ian's friends." Zoe jabbed Quinn in the chest with the head of dildo and Quinn rubbed the spot, surprised by the force of the thing.
I might have to get me one of those...
"Fine, fine. You have my word, but relax."
"Relax? Relax?!" Zoe squeaked.
"Who knows, you might find something you like," Quinn offered.
"With Ian around, I hardly need the help," Zoe fired back and Quinn grimaced.
"Ugh, god. Gross."
"I think you asked for that one."
The door bell rang and Quinn rushed to answer it just in time to find Janelle and a swarm of other teachers standing on Zoe's doorstep in the bright, June sunlight.
"Hope you don't mind. We carpooled," Janelle said.
"I brought spinach dip," Emma, a second grade teacher with bushy brown hair called from over Janelle's shoulder and Janelle turned to glare at her.
"Great," Quinn forced a smile. "I hope everyone is hungry."
She ushered all the women inside and they took seats on the wide, black sectional, though nobody had bothered to make a plate of food just yet. Together they chattered and laughed while the other few groups of ladies walked through, all squawking about how excited they were and how much fun they knew tonight was going to be. Even Zoe--who, despite Ian's influence generally had a large stick shoved up her ass--seemed to be having a good time chatting with Janelle about the stresses of life and the politics of their small, New England town.
Good, she thought, someone had to worry about that shit because I most certainly am not.
When the whole of the party was assembled, she stepped into the center of the room and handed everyone a pamphlet.
"Ok, ladies, we all know why we're here," she beamed.
"Or at least most of us did," Zoe muttered and Quinn shot her sister a look.
'Now, I'm not going to waste time. Let's get to our first item of the night, shall we?" The girls oohed and ahed and Quinn rifled through the first box until she found a smaller, red velvet box shaped almost like a treasure chest. Flicking open the little latch on the front, she pulled out the inner drawers of the chest and displayed the insides.
"This is the complete 69 shades of restraints boxed set. Each item is available individually, but I think you'll find they're a whole lot more fun when you have access to them all." She pulled out the red leather flogger and handed it to her wide-eyed sister.
"Pass it around, why don't you?" Quinn asked, then whipped out a red feather duster. "We've got a little tickler, too, for those of you ladies who'd like to give it a try." This she handed to her friend Gina from spin class.
"And finally--the piece de resistance--" She pulled a huge, black chrome vibrator from the box. "It has seventeen pleasure settings, ladies," Quinn said. "And the best part? The top is completely removable to slip into your panties for a night on the town with your significant other."