I melted into my panties. The aching pulse inside me has pounded hard for him ever since.
My other crush is my mystery man. I have a guardian angel. For years now, wherever I go, someone is watching over me.
Every year since I left college, I’ve gotten a birthday card, cards at Easter and Christmas, and a romantic Valentine’s card. All unsigned. A basket of flowers gets delivered to my apartment every week, wherever I’m living. No card, just a lovely arrangement of fresh blooms, always in a pretty basket shaped like a top hat.
I’ve never met him—I’m sure it’s a him—and I’ve never even seen him, but whenever there’s any trouble, someone takes care of it.
Once, my car broke down and had to be towed, then there was a huge amount of work that needed doing. When I went to the shop to collect it, everything was paid for, the car had been valeted and detailed, and a bouquet of flowers was on the driver’s seat.
My last landlord tried some creepy and sketchy shit once, and a day later, he had a personality transplant. Couldn’t do enough for me.
All this is unexplained and wonderful, but JoJo thinks I should be getting my life into gear.
“It’s like you’re living your life on hold,” she says. “You can’t be saving yourself forever for some mystery man, Lucy. He seems wonderful, but how do you know that he’s even real?”
“He must be real. You’ve seen the cards, JoJo. And the flowers. You remember when my car broke down? And that landlord who tried to… well, you remember.” I shudder. “What a creep.”
“I’m so glad you got out of there.”
“Me, too.” I thought I would have to fight to keep my little V-card. Not that it means all that much, but that slimy beast… “But you remember. It just stopped. All the threats and harassment and… everything. One day it started up, then less than forty-eight hours later, it stopped. Instead, he was leaving messages offering me rent-free months, asking if there were any repairs or renovations I wanted.”
“I remember. It happened right after you told me about it.”
“It’s you! JoJo. You’re my secret admirer.”
“Yeah. Just wait until McQueen hears about it.” He was her stripper hunk of a husband.
“You think he’ll go for it?”
“McQueen? Don’t even joke about it. He gets mad enough at the thought of a man looking at me. A woman? I don’t even want to think what he would do.”
“And he’s a dancer.”
“I know, right? You can go and watch him. That’s fine.” Not that I have. “You can check out all the big thrills in my married life whenever you want…”
“JoJo…” I hide my face and make bars with my fingers.
“Okay, Lucy. Maybe your secret admirer is real. But what if he’s one of those billionaire recluses? What if you never meet him?” She cocks an eyebrow at me. “Maybe it’s someone with a reason to stay in the shadows. Or it could be that he’s just too shy to come forward.”
When Paul offers to drive me home, it’s all I can do to stop myself from springing into his arms.
“Don’t go home with the car service.” His voice is so dark and strong. “Allow me to chauffeur you.”
“Will you put on a uniform with a cap?”
“Would you like that?”
“Paul, I’m really glad that you haven’t had a drink. It’s lovely that you want to drive me home.” I peer up at him. “I know I’ll always be safe with you. I’ve had a couple of drinks, though. Are you sure that you’re going to be safe with me?”
I chatter all the way on the drive home. All I want is for him to keep looking at me the way he does. Anything I can say to make him turn his head, so I can feel his eyes on me. So I get a faint whiff of his breath. A little more of the scent of him.
His scent is a dizzying mix of expensive cologne and a darker note of raw man. It feels dirty, and scary, in the best way. But it makes me afraid. I’ve been kissed before. I’ve fooled around. But just looking into Paul’s eyes feels like going further than I’ve ever gone with a man before.
The heat of his body close to mine in the car makes me think I’ve never been with a man at all.
And I’ve crushed on him so hard since the first time I met him. He drove out to my and Jojo’s dorm to pick her up from school.
He seemed like the most dangerous man I ever met. I loved his car and his suit. And the scar under his dagger-sharp eye dripped shivers down my belly. It made me think of nursing and protecting him. Of him needing someone when the wound was open. Needing someone like me.